Ryan Simpson

@aakashgupta How does this math work in regions where having large trees near your home is a serious danger in hurricane season?

Let me explain exactly why every new subdivision in America looks like the top photo, because the math is wild. A mature tree increases a home's value by 7 to 19 percent. On a $400,000 house, that's $28,000 to $76,000. A single shade tree produces the cooling equivalent of ten room-size air conditioners running 20 hours a day. One tree on the west side of a house cuts energy bills by 12 percent within 15 years. The bottom photo is worth more, costs less to live in, and sells faster. This has been documented by the University of Washington, Clemson, Michigan State, and the USDA. The data is not in dispute. Removing those trees saves the builder roughly $5,000 per lot. Concrete trucks need twice the dripline radius of every standing tree. Utility trenches need flat ground. A bulldozer flattens 200 lots in an afternoon. Preserving trees adds weeks and thousands per home. So the developer pockets $5,000 in savings and the buyer eats $50,000 in lost value for the next two decades. The person making the decision and the person paying for it have never been in the same room. The Woodlands, Texas is the proof of what happens when they are. George Mitchell bought 28,000 acres of Houston timberland in 1974 and preserved 28% as permanent green space. He forced McDonald's to build behind the tree canopy. That McDonald's became one of the highest-volume locations in Texas. The first office building, designed to reflect the surrounding forest so you couldn't see it from the street, leased completely. The Woodlands median home price today: $615,000. Katy, a comparable Houston suburb that clear-cut: $375,000. Named #1 community to live in America two years running. Fifty years of data. The trees are worth more than removing them saves. Developers clear-cut anyway because they sell the house once and leave. You live in it for 30 years.

@PalmyrPar He put Asmongold in a music video then, presumably after being informed who Asmongold is and the things he says, censored him out.

No one has ever been as desperate to be famous as “bbno$” is.

@sabatonfan69 Trying to figure out the angle like...

This place has changed so much that seeing an account called “food lover” just posting food engagement without a check is baffling to me. I thought for a few minutes and was like okay maybe this guys just loves food? Maybe it’s that simple, like it used to be.

@LumpyTheCook You're right, I think that people feel saying 'larper' is more adult. 'Poser' smacks of the high school lunch table.

Not sure how I feel about people throwing around the term “larpers” like this. The humble LARPer just wants to go to the parking lot of a shut-down Kmart to put on robe and wizard hat and cast LIGHTNING BOLT, not this. The term “poser” already exists and is more fitting.

@wylfcen It's probably a good slogan for a campaign to get kids to drink more milk but it's not how I'm going to discuss dietary restrictions.

STOP saying you’re “lactose tolerant.” Both those words are from French. Instead, say you’re “milk strong.”

@Philip_Mundhen3 @wil_da_beast630 According to the French la vice anglais was masochism, specifically being whipped, and they believed Englishmen picked up this habit at their public (meaning private) schools.

Kudos. I'd been thinking of making an asterisk-abuse meme. But "said 'cunt' during sex or Britain"? What is this practice of "Britain?" Is it something like sodomy? Is it a vice peculiar to the English?

Two takes: (1) I really don't care at all that a politician's wife or lover once said "faggot." The percentage of tolerable people who have NEVER said "cunt" during sex or Britain, or "nigga" to a hoops defender, is on the order of 3%. I am spelling out these words because "we grown." But...(2) This common sense rule has to go both ways. What was the Mamdanis' position on the Covington kids?

@accelball @cockyfaithful2 That's Carolina Gold mustard BBQ sauce, not gravy.

@cockyfaithful2 There’s gravy on the meat lol. It looks good though. Where’s it at? Love to try SC bbq for the first time 😂

That ain’t SC bbq. This is. #Dukesbbq

@AudentiorIbo @Trogool @memeticsisyphus @CruxStellarum Apparently he received the last rites and William F Buckley compared him to Voltaire, who did likewise. nytimes.com/1985/12/08/nyr….

@Trogool @memeticsisyphus @CruxStellarum Yes, an atheist. Among atheists there is a spectrum of hostility to the idea of deity and he was on the less hostile side.

“War is bad” Ok I’m with you “This war primarily benefits another country at great expense to national treasury and is a danger in spinning out of control.” Yeah I can see that. “And that other country killed Charlie Kirk.” What… “And his wife trafficked children for Epstein.” Huh? “And Epstein worked for that country to black mail every world leader into doing its bidding using baby rape” Ok you’re all retarded. “You’re Jewish”

@Trespasserz @FearedBuck I think that was the one who got his wig snatched. Androphilic, I believe.

@FearedBuck wasn't Clavicular the guy who got caught on stream the other day "adjusting" a bunch of padding on his shoulders and upper arms to make himself look bigger? Clavicular is the textbook definition of a tool.

Clavicular ends and walks out of his Channel 5 interview with Andrew Callaghan after Andrew reveals he’s satisfied with how he looks and doesn’t need looksmaxxing

@trey__r @finestsoup I wonder what it feels like to be a man who is such a satire of an out of touch wannabe intellectual that the things he writes in earnest all sound like they could be a guest column from The Onion's golden age. Like a fish in water he doesn't even know the irony is there.

@finestsoup Really tough competition with this David Brooks classic

If this website wasn't broken we'd be talking about this article for weeks lmao

@western_lives @MemoryMedieval Most of the army had no connection to those people but if they were unmoved by their plight they had to be concerned that locals in the fortress would open the gates for the civilians, giving Caesar a chance to storm, or even betray them to the Romans for their families sake.

@western_lives @MemoryMedieval The civilians stuck between the walls were the women, children and elderly of the locals who gathered in Alesia. The Gaulish army expelled them to save food. Caesar left them between the lines, knowing their cries would be worse for enemy morale than watching Romans kill them.

Why didn't Vercingetorix fight to the death? I think about this a lot.

@TerribleMaps I don't know about SC, I think people would find our BBQ hash weirder than fried pig ears. But this isn't even a terrible map. Few misspellings, mostly accurate foods, correct state shapes. Was this even made by AI?

The weirdest foods in each U.S. state

@theworldhasgo19 @TerribleMaps I make a hotdog chili that has just a hint of cinnamon, nutmeg and allspice in it. It sounds weird but it's good if you don't overdo it. But I wouldn't eat it by itself.

@TerribleMaps I’m in Ohio. I hate skyline chili. Who tf likes chili that tastes like there’s cinnamon in it?!?

@r_todler @TerribleMaps Maybe one is chili on cinnamon rolls and the other is chunks of cinnamon roll in a bowl of chili? Either way it sounds awful.

@TerribleMaps Is it really weird if two non adjacent states eat it?

@odalfren @EricRichards22

@EricRichards22 Did he come back from his job of getting beaten and raped?

This shit is going to obliterate the boomers completely defenseless worse than the amherst smallpox blankets that never happened

@avidseries I've only listened to three podcasts that I can recall. @TheRestHistory, @MikeDuncan's History of Rome and @TylerMahanCoe's Cocaine and Rhinestones.

I've never listened to a podcast for more than 3 or 4 minutes. I don't have the patience to listen to people ramble on while I wait for them to talk about something I might be interested in. I'm not sure there's ever been a less efficient way to transmit information.

@ronsterd89 The checkout line is turned around backwards. It should go towards the exit, not the interior. AI doesn't know how a store works.

What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you see this photo?

@NightMa71605673 @st_louis_stan You may have missed the part about how that was a demonstration of bad logic.

@simpsonryan32 @st_louis_stan Ha! Where to begin? Your tweet demonstrates exactly what he's talking about. If you think men in their 30s are more attracted to "peers" than 18 year olds, I don't know what to tell you. That OP framed it as about his daughter illustrates the point re performative masculinity.

There's a certain kind of performative masculinity you see with dork 35+ yo men where they get extremely pissed the heck off at the idea of age gap relationships and they dress it up as moral outrage but it's actually based in correct self perception of inadequacy in intramale sexual completion

@PaperhackWriter @DieinPlace One of the richest men in the world at the time. Faced with a similar situation how many of our current wealthy people would do the same?

@DieinPlace It's why we romanticize the Captain going down with his ship, and the Titanic band playing to the end.

Why so many adventure films have a moment where the dude says to his compadres as the baddies are bearing down: "you, go. I'll hold 'em here as long as I can." Its why in fiction Private Ryan says... "Fuck that, I'm staying", and in real life why Audie Murphy stays on that machine gun amidst the flames of a burning TD and stalls an entire German offensive. It's hard coded.