Thomy ⚾️🍺 🎣✈ 🇺🇸🇨🇦

I swear, I would love to see some of these people’s houses I work with. The way some of these Flight Attendants leave a galley, just abysmal

I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier person.

I’m about get a gallon of Don Julio & show everybody how I been feeling lately

Quick reminder: The weather is warming up. Wash your butts and wear deodorant every day. No skipsies!

Honey. If I have to order standing up, please don’t flip a screen at me for a tip.

I’m beginning to think that for some of you the wheels on the bus are not going ‘round and ‘round. 🚌

@meatstick2004 The stache is a very sexy look on you

Should I go back to just a mustache?

None of these woman wearing flip flops have a full pinky toe nail. They just got enough to put a dab of polish on there.

Only 2 wheelchairs leaving RSW 😳 who out here doing the Lord’s work?!

Me before boarding this morning - yum this breakfast burrito is delicious Me during demo - dear sweet baby Jesus read the announcement faster honey 😳🥺

@TJennerXT So damn sexy 😈

That felt great! Can't wait for round-2.

People asking for more than one PDB 🍺🍷☕️🥃 then acting like I have 3 heads when they’re not finished and I go to collect everything ✈️

If you’re loud in the morning, I automatically don’t like you. ☕️

Boarding Lady with coffee in hand comes to back galley. “I left my bag and you need to come put it in the bin” Me - No Lady - Me - Lady - just like that? No? Me - No is a complete sentence. She puts coffee on lowered tray table and stows her own bag.

Headed in to work after the recent winter meltdown and another storm about to roll in.

IYKYK

Dear God, when I get old, please don't let me be chewing for no damn reason

@YoungCopX Man what a beautiful cock