Vindicated Chidi 🕊@Vindicatedchidi
A few weeks ago, I ran into an acquaintance of mine. The atmosphere felt a bit tense, and I could tell something wasn’t right. Unknown to me, he had been upset with me for a while and I had no idea why.
That day, he gathered the courage to speak.
He said he was disappointed in me.
I was surprised. “What did I do?” I asked calmly.
He told me he lost his father some time ago and had reached out to me. According to him, I didn’t show enough concern. Yes, I sent my condolences, but to him, that wasn’t enough. He expected more… he expected me to be financially involved like a “Committee of Friends.”
I paused for a moment.
First, I appreciated him for speaking up. Not everyone has that courage. Many people would have kept it in their hearts, allowing it to grow into resentment.
Then I gently asked him to sit down.
I began to share, just a little of what I was going through during that same period his father passed away.
As I spoke, his expression changed.
He was shocked.
For a moment, he couldn’t even say a word. Then he finally spoke: “But… you looked fine. You looked okay.”
I smiled.
That’s the reality for many of us.
In a place like ours, people expect you to look like your problems before they take you seriously. If you’re still smiling, still showing up, still functioning, still looking healthy, then surely, you must be fine… right?
But life doesn’t work that way.
I didn’t go into full details. I just gave him a brief summary. It was enough.
He apologized.
Softly, he said, “chidi, I didn’t know.”
And I told him something simple: “You don’t have to know.”
The truth is, many people are fighting battles you will never hear about.
I am one of those people. I don’t talk about my problems. You will see me, I will smile, I will show up, I will do my work, and I will keep going. I don't complain.
I remember a particular day… I came straight from the hospital to the football field. Nobody knew where I was coming from. Nobody knew what I was dealing with.
But I still played. I still gave my best. I still performed.
And when the game ended, I quietly left.
That is the reality for many people around you.
So my message to you is simple,
Dear colleagues… Nobody forgot you.
People are not ignoring you on purpose. Many are just trying to survive. Many are carrying silent burdens. Many are doing their best just to stay afloat.
It would be unfair, even insensitive to expect everyone to carry your emotions when they are already struggling with their own.
If you ever feel hurt by someone, don’t assume.
Go to them. Talk to them. Ask questions.
You might be surprised to discover that the person you thought ignored you… is actually fighting a battle you cannot see.
And to you reading this…
I don’t know what you are going through right now.
But please, don’t give up.
Hold on. Stay strong. Keep moving.
Your help will come. Oga adi mma!!!
Shalom 🙏
