Sean McCluskey

@cookingwithc479 Carter’s got the right idea. I like three seconds of whiskey in a glass.

One of my favourite sweet treats! Flapjacks! Made these ones for my lunchbox ☺️😋

@cowincrisis Don’t let him scare you. You’re no cowherd.

alright guys let’s pack it up, doomer doesn’t want us doing this

The viral ‘Animal Farm’ marketing of wildlife trading diss tracks is my favorite Twitter sub genre.

@katrosenfield Infinite Jest should be worth, like FOUR toppings.

Fond memories of those early years when my entire family dined out weekly on the pizzas I earned from being a massive nerd

@Sloanstweets And they were loyle to their capo. The End.

Found the original ending to The Sopranos that David Chase decided to cut

@DiscussingFilm So they’re trying to murder the un-Bourne?

Jason Statham will star in David Ayer's new film ‘JOHN DOE’. The film follows a man with no memory, no past & no name who soon discovers he was trained for a mission and is being hunted by the people who assigned him. (Source: Deadline)

@monsterhunter45 I heard that backstage drama between series stars Truman and Stalin led to the underwhelming 'Korean Police Action' spinoff.

I know there's been 11 World Wars, but really only the first 4 were entertaining and after that they were just cashing in rehashing old story lines. WW7 was a prequel, and WW9 was the gritty reboot. (in case there are any US congresswomen reading, that was sarcastic)

@SummoTCB 'Oh, crumbs' needs to come back into general usage.

Wow

@VengerSatanis @KevinLamb74 You think Kevin J. O’Connor had it bad in Deep Rising, wait’ll you see what happened to the poor bastard in The Mummy.

@KevinLamb74 WTF...?!? Are you kidding me, bro? I watched Deep Rising last night. Hadn't seen it in, like, 10 years. Still holds up, even if the CGI isn't always the best. Damn, I kept feeling bad for the sidekick dude with the screechy voice. Whatever happened to that dude?

Last night I thought of a list of movies to suggest to my teenage son to see if he wanted to watch any of them and I went "Option 1: Deep Rising. It's about a cruise ship that gets attacked by a monster that eats everyone on board, builds a nest and then a team of mercenaries boards the ship and--" "YES. I want to watch that." "Don't you want to hear the other options?" "No. I want to see that one." Lol, so yeah, we watched Deep Rising. First time I'd seen it in decades and it was a freaking BLAST. Great fun from beginning to end, quite gory for a popcorn movie and surprisingly Cthulhu-esque. Highly recommended.

@For_Film_Fans I enjoy the dramatic reading of the letter by Oscar Isaac, another Star Wars alum who also reportedly had some second thoughts. m.youtube.com/watch?v=d9hfPM…

An unhappy ALEC GUINNESS writes to a friend whilst filming STAR WARS in 1976 and references a “rangy, languid young man who is probably intelligent and amusing” by the name of ‘Tennyson’ or ‘Ellison’ Ford.

@abbythelibb_ There's business in the fort. Man business. You probably wouldn't understand it, but if you did, you definitely wouldn't like it.

Husband made a blanket fort, and he's currently in there with the 1 and 2 year old boys. I'm informed I'm not allowed in "cause you don't have a weiner."

@londonette It's like he's got a Cheesecake Factory menu, only seven pages shorter.

Me flicking through the menu at an Indian restaurant pretending to be open minded when I know full well I’m going to order the chicken tikka masala

@vvestiges I know the pros call headphones ‘cans,’ but to say more would be vulgar, I fear.

(‘70s)

@ActwithAlison "if i liked your tweet, well then, i liked it, or laughed at it, or made a mistake."

i do not have an automatic "like" feature on my tweets and wouldn't know how to use ai if it hit me in the face. if i liked your tweet, well then, i liked it, or laughed at it, or made a mistake. rarely check dm's & just realized the dm's on my instagram are open to all

Can I have an explanation of this phenomenon without using bean soup as an example? I don't like bean soup.

@MikeRGlenn I always imagined some contracting company like Temporary Henchman and Uniformed Guard Service (THUGS) providing labor for nefarious masterminds, proving that the real villainy happens in the HR Department.

I was watching the James Bond movie, "You Only Live Twice," and noticed all the people working in Blofeld's volcano lair. I was wondering if the place had a cafeteria for the employees. What about all the jump suits? Who had the contract to supply them? Is there an HR Department?

@pr0ud_americans He appears to have lost the STAIRING contest.

FAFO, the guy in the white shirt was definitely in the find out stage.😬

@VinceClassic I feel the same way about these two.

The guy on the left should be named John Michael Higgins and the guy on the right should be named Shea Whigham, but it’s the opposite. It’s all fucked up.

@VladTheInflator I wish I had a counterargument.

When your friend buys a Jeep:

@Todd_Spence All civil and criminal trials should be conducted this way. 'Taurus Decernat.'

The greatest bit JACKASS ever did. A perfect combination of silly and completely insane 🔥