Chone Renner

Just saw a bird sitting on a dog in a field and was wondering why the dog didn't chase it away. Then realized it was a wooden cutout of a dog made to deter birds. THEN I realized I am dumber than a bird.

@thebasedbrah @RokoMijic @tomieinlove Yea that’s because you quoted something that was not stated or even suggested.

@RokoMijic @tomieinlove “Because everyone makes so much that they have nothing else to do with it!” No one making $100k thinks like this

What exactly is the point of buying insurance? Obviously, I’m going to pay more money than I get back, because otherwise the insurance company wouldn’t turn a profit. But for some reason everyone does it?

@MGTOW_Mot @RokoMijic @tomieinlove Yea but what if instead of that something else happened, what then huh??

@RokoMijic @tomieinlove What if instead of breaking your back, they pay out for things like feeling sad and instead of having to pay in, everyone gets it. But you still pay for it, and can't opt out.

@optimusgrime23 @Apple_Sauced_ @Mike_kim714 Which course?

@Apple_Sauced_ @Mike_kim714 Ah yes there is no issue with the fact that many of the worlds greatest courses can no longer host tournaments and most of the ones that can are still driver and wedge fests.

No tees, links style bunkers, 10 club limit. Scoring goes way up. Also instead of the groove rule trying to take off spin which lowered the scoring avg, do the opposite. Super aggressive grooves that make wedges spin back too much.

@TheGhostofhogan I’m thinking about +49. He could spot me a stroke a hole and it’s a very close match.

Ok so you start at 150 yards at Torrey Pines on each hole, over 4 days what do you shoot? All holes are the same par on the scorecard. Crunch some numbers and give me your 4 day total. Rose goes -23. Let’s hear the helmet numbers…..

@Scholars_Stage Guy who thinks fast serve local burger joints don’t exist unless they have an app.

This is one area of life where America has clearly improved . Food options are FAR better—and not just immigrant foods either. There are a dozen fast casual burger joints better than McDonalds that just did not exist in 1997.

My private theory for what has happened since 2000: mid-range restaurant food has gotten far far tastier since then, meaning that there is a much larger gap between the quality of food people can cook at home \ quality of food they can by *relatively* cheap.

Type of weather that puts you in a bad mood within minutes

Blast the Bluey theme song at my funeral and let the kids go nuts. That’s what I say.

More like MVPlease catch routine fly balls in the World Series

For some reason I can’t sing Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter without dipping into my Elton John voice. They should do a collab.

It’s Mango Wave Summer

Things start falling out of the fridge and I turn into Odell Beckham in warmups.

Giancarlo Stanton is a top 3 Yankee of the last 15 years

I golf between 1.2-2.3 mph depending on the day. With no one in front of me I can top out at 2.5 with the wind at my back.

Unloaded the dishwasher at night. Now I get to sleep in tomorrow.

I could make the cut in an alternate event if I got one mulligan in the tee box on every hole.

All I care about in life is likes on what used to be twitter.

You put caramelized onions and buffalo sauce on something, I will eat it.

Remember when Tatum on the Celtics was good?

The closing scene in Saltburn could be 45 minutes long and no one would complain