rotsu

If you know me through the artstyle... No you don't... The name came from friends who liked to play around with my online name LOLOL quite fitting for a nsfw account I will yap a lot here... My free space because I feel self conscious to yap on the other account

Losers

Is it right to label myself as a merch artist when I have no physical merch and everytime I post its "design for fun" LOL Fake merch artist😔✌️

I want to make more memo pads... But I'll see how the first one goes first

Im too burnt out to draw so im stuck with my thoughts i want to end myself I cant stop drawing if I stop this happens ueueue im so pathetic Im nothing without drawing yet even with drawing im still nothing But yknow.. at least I made something _:(´ཀ`」∠):_

I dont deserve whatever I've built here I just want to disappear orz

I made a stupidly long comic, keep creating merch designs, thinking everyday what I could draw Just for me to spiral and hold back the overwhelming urge to just delete it all

My works sucks so bad ugh why do I even keep trying ueueueueu At this point its madness Madness I tell you I keep drawing and drawing for that little bit of happiness and for what???

Ugh gonna use this negative energy to write my angsty stolitz fic

Thinking if I should just remove all the works on my store and just drop limited time as and when

Why must I be alive Being alive is so sad😭😭😭😭😭

Sometimes I wonder if this is what coming to terms of being alone is like LOL Im gonna die alone with no memorable achievements hahahah Man I hate spiralling

I seriously have the worst social skills I only have 2 friends i go out quite a number of times with a year I barely talk to anyone outside of work I dont dare to talk to people on socials I just end up yapping on insta stories or here for no one in particular

I can definitely see myself once again deleting my twitter and restarting my socials all over again once im out of the fandom Never ending loop I can never hold onto a community, never had the social skills for it anyways

Put up interests checks only for projects to flop in the end Tried self funding but I cant get it to sell anyways People can be like yes!! I want!!! And all I'll do is go "yeah, me too lol"

Just me spiralling again but man each time I think about how my sales is dropping i wonder where I went wrong Then I think "ah its because im not good enough" Followed by acceptance and just drawing hoping that I can make merch that'll pop off one day One day.... Orz

Gonna avoid the for you tab cos its all the fucking drama

Like can this all wait until we have all the seasons of hb Bash whoever you want for all I care just wait until we have the end without anything changing behind

I doubt it would change anything but I really hope this stupid drama doesnt affect the show production in the future I still need my stolitz I dont fucking care i just want my stupid pixels

Bruh ngl I really hate the English side of fandoms There's always so much drama At least with the other languages it'll be cant read cant understand just scroll But the English side... can read can understand, my head hurts