Roga

@superman1965169 i love u dude :-)

: My wife always complains I don't do enough housework but it's complete bollocks I always lift my legs so she can do the hoovering..."

@clairalouisa that is wy we have three kids

@clairalouisa :-)

Even my tysons loving this weather its really put a smile on his face lol :-):-):-):-):-):-)

Well done @clairalouisa x

"@clairalouisa wanted to try something different in bed last night. So we slept with the light on."

"@clairalouisa has just started going through the change. It's going to be really weird calling her Dave."

"@clairalouisa I like to eat at Brazilian restaurants. At least I know there won't be any hair in my food."

"@clairalouisa I helped my wife with the dinner last night. I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm."

With all these celebrities getting arrested for child molestation, it almost makes me wonder if Gary Glitter did have a gang

"My neighbours are fucking weird. My dog takes a shit in their garden and I'm the one who gets the dirty looks."

"@clairalouisa It's our 14th anniversary today. Funny though, I don't remember breaking two mirrors."

Lucky for Newcastle that Suarez wasn't playing, or it could have been ate

#shoutout @hellrider2003 @superman1965169 @Bazzza78 @faizeednb @clairalouisa Have a good weekend :-)

: My wife said to me the other day, 'I feel like such a hypocrite' I said, 'what the fuck is a crite?

Happy St George’s Day " ENGLISH TIL I DIE. AND PROUD TO BE :-)

"@clairalouisa Women wake up yawning and men with an erection. Coincidence? I think not."

What's the difference between Margeret Thatcher and Justin Bieber? Hopefully only a few days