tired ben affleck

I think smartphones are ruining our lives but also if I had to go to the airport in 1998 with just my wits & a subway map I’d kill myself

If god ever came down and gave me one wish in life, it would be this.

Text from mom: My cousin died last night. Her house caught fire. Maybe arson. She was 87. You met her once in 1997. Me: I’m so sorry to hear that. Let me know if you wanna call Mom: 👍 How do I watch Netflix on ipad

The way Hunter Biden is on here roasting these hoes

Sometimes your boyfriend will show you a photo that seen through the loving and forgiving eyes of a romantic partner is a “cute picture” of yourself and then it looks like a national enquirer photo of Hillary Clinton’s lovechild with a lizard

Just letting everyone know I’m reading a book right now. I also drank 7 glasses of water yesterday. Im not saying explicitly that I’m a better person than you, but it is heavily heavily implied. Heaven is going to be awesome!

If anybody asks how I’m doing right now I’m going to send them this video as a representation of my current state of mind

happy pride

I feel like if you showed this video to a bunch of fifth graders as part of a “weed is cringe” program it would work

this is exactly how i think dua lipa’s life is

no bc this was terrifying

This is what I need Noah Beck to wear on that Baywatch reboot btw

alcohol is great because of the way it lets you take aggression you usually turn inwards, and direct it outwards, at loved ones, strangers, and inanimate objects.

wdym war on protein, they’re literally putting that shit in doritos

They on tv talking about some turn your ACs off for a little while so we don’t black out.. turn off Times Square first bitch..

Of course, he who has a peanut allergy garners my sympathy. But he will never garner my respect. You were not meant for this earth and you are on borrowed time

if someone followed me around my house and saw how much i use my phone i believe they’d choose to mercy kill me

Please stop. I don’t want an AI summary of my Google search. I don’t want an AI summary of the text message from my friend at work. I don’t want an AI summary of the email I’m about to read. Please just stop.

The last thing you see before opening ChatGPT

Pope Leo writes, “The speed and ease with which answers or summaries can be obtained risk extinguishing the desire to ask questions.” Curiosity and the human hunger to learn are under attack. They are trying to build a world in which no one *wants* to know anything.