Jonathan D Hearn

Pre-save my new single "CHASER" on Spotify: distrokid.com/hyperfollow/pc… (powered by @distrokid)

@henningwehn this guy is no where near as funny as you. Albeit taller....

@TottenhamConse1 With the lack of mathematical rudiments displayed in this post, is it any wonder that your party has crashed our economy in recent weeks? #EnoughIsEnough

Labour can’t even manage it’s own finances, let alone the nations.

@TottenhamConse1 Or perhaps it has something to do with your party cutting 21,000 front line police officers? #EnoughIsEnough

London is in anarchy, one man is to blame #SadiqKhan

@TottenhamConse1 At least grammar check your tweet before posting it, fucktards. Also, according to your post, Labour overspent by just over five thousand pounds. I doubt that equates to what your party spends on champagne each week. #EnoughIsEnough

If ever anyone doubts why @RMTunion campaigns vigorously to maintain staffing and safety levels on the railway, then this tweet encapsulates it all. 👇 Truly horrifying.

@bushontheradio @RichieFirth "what did you find in your guttering?" I think you just reached #peakpartridge

I don't post much, but this was worth logging in for! twitter.com/PeterGarbacz/s…

@bushontheradio @RichieFirth I think @daveberry_tweet @RealDysonator just declared war!

@AldiUK will your new, fresh vegan & rosemary & red onion frozen sausages be staying after January? They taste amazing!

@absoluteradio man bear pig. #SouthPark

@bushontheradio @absoluteradio make sure you "work hard" and "be nice" 😉

The Samaritans have a suicide hotline. The number is: 116 123. And it's free. It takes a lot of courage to make that first step to getting help. But for people like you just living a normal life can be an act of heroism. Go on pick up the phone. You got this. Dxxxxx

Life can be unbearable I know, but honestly if you can just put one fucking foot in front of the other things have a real incredible habit of getting better. So this is for you if you’re alone and you don’t know where else to turn…

More importantly I didn’t know I was going to marry the woman of my dreams and have a little family of my own. If I could reach back through time and say anything to the younger me I'd say what lots of people would say to their younger selves - try not to worry too much.

I’m writing this late at night because it was almost always late at night when these things flared up for me. I thought I was a man back then but I wasn’t really I was just a kid. I didn’t have a clue that I was going to be this big rock star,

that the conversation we had which lasted a few hours really helped to turn my life around. I didn’t know it at the time, but I had PTSD. Thanks to my conversation with a Samaritan called Tim I was able to find the courage to get real treatment.

That they must have a lot of people who are far worse than me but that I really didn’t know where else to go. It was too late to bother my family and I’d bothered them way too many times with my stupid bullshit already. Now this is twitter so I’ll cut a long story short and say

And I’m a bit emotional writing this bit… What I got was a genuine concerned human being. It felt odd. Against all my expectations they actually sounded more down in the dumps than me. I don’t know why but I said sorry for calling.

Like It did when I was a kid. But I wasn’t a kid anymore I was a 6ft 2, bluff, northern man 20s. I wasn’t brought up to go to strangers for help and I was expecting some sunny bullshit do-gooder on the other end, so my hand was hovering over the receiver ready to hang up But…