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Hey bro im fading from existence otherwise im good

i just got stabbed in the stomach at Walmart

@galacticdad Rocky hate Mark

I want, no…I need a one dance

An email will never find him

you’re not beating the celtics when al horford scores 26 points and his son makes 6 threes

aww hi little bud-... oh...

Ever since I left the city you

@porkbub Goes hard

they’re calling my bladee stanley a coworker bottle in the gc

how many dogs are in this image?

When you genuinely say Hi

Might be time for a reread ooouuu

@uwutada Jajahdhd

タオルで拭いてもらって嬉しそうな子アザラシがかわいい

@lossandgain Cheers Shaycat 😺

Lady in front of me to grocery checkout guy: Oh wow. just found a coupon in my purse! How lucky is that? Me: Heh. Never kill yourself... Lady: [turning around] What? Me: I said "never kill yourself."

Xi Jinping said WHAT?!

@sailorbrazil LFMSMKSHG

Holy fuckkkkkk