amaya ⋆｡

☾☆ edtwt intro post / moot hunt ☆☾ Amaya | 28 🇬🇧 | minors dni • recently relapsed ana-r, pro-recovery • also post abt depression, ME/CFS, cPTSD, grief & general yapping • ♡︎ nature, music, poetry ♡︎ • looking for my spark, I lost it somewhere • sweary

˚.🎀༘⋆ how to win me over through my stomach when the topic is: 🍰 cake – lava 🍨 ice cream – mint choc chip 🍫 chocolate – tonys caramel sea salt 🍹 juice – oj 🥃 soda – pepsi max 🥑 fruit – 🍌 🍕pizza – hawaiian +mushrooms 🧇 breakfast – scrambled egg 🍡 dessert – brownie

hello sudden intense feeling of dread care to explain yourself?

@cassleish it's so infuriating lol, I've maintained for three days when I was losing every day at 200-300 cals higher intake last week like bruuuuh 😭

@troymerl it’s like that for me sometimes 🫠

the way my weight loss has absolutely no relation to my deficit in any given week baffles me 😭

@rottingfruits i mean apart from the bit about being a married monogamous man 😂

@rottingfruits feeeeel this

i have lived so many lives and not just in the DID sense. i have so much lore but now I am just a straight edge monogamous married man in a healthy relationship. it’s very strange, i love it more than anything, but my ptsd remains in this state of fearing that chaos again

@cassleish @Debbie8t5 I'd smash my sig on that 😈

@troymerl @Debbie8t5 you had it so good 😩 i’m starting a petition to bring them back immediately!!

Mr Kipling used to do a French Fancy birthday cake. Honestly, I didn't dream it.

@cassleish @Debbie8t5 I had the pink one for my 13th birthday 😭😭

@revivalrelapse 😌🥰

@troymerl i will make you a plate next time ♡

☆dinner☆ ♥︎690 c, 16g p, 13g f♥︎ •°21½ hr fast°• let the reduced section of m&s decide my meal today

I be like "this is great I've eaten so little and don't feel hungry" then 10 minutes later I want to eat EVERYTHING

I keep flicking between having no appetite and feeling absolutely famished and it's driving me CRAZY 🥴

me af

@cassleish I'm so sorry lovely, it's tragic what this disorder robs us of 💔🫂

my family is going to mexico for an early 18th bday present for my lil sis & i am not going because i fear i won’t have control of cals & my safe foods, i am 28 and this has been my life, turning down major family events all because of this stupid ed i hate it i hate it i hate it

@skinnebo so real idk what I'd do without a brew

so like what do non British oomfs drink when they’re feeling a bit blue? can’t imagine not having a cup of tea to get me through the tough times

@thesnorkening genuinely 😭😭

@troymerl This is so weird lmaooo

temperature dysregulation is whack, currently in bed with a fluffy blanket over my torso and a cooling blanket on my legs 🫠

@thesnorkening broooo stoppp I thought I had lupus for this reason too 💀💀💀

@troymerl Before I got diagnosed I googled "hot red face when tired" so many times 😭 it just kept saying lupus

@thesnorkening not necessarily when I'm going into PEM but when I'm more run down & dysregulated I get a lot of random/sudden flushing, it's actually become a warning sign that I need to rest to avoid a full blown crash 😂

@troymerl SAME do your cheeks get flushed when you're going into PEM?

@thesnorkening 💓💓💓

I made a lot of progress with my vulnerability issues lately and now I cry at everything lol it feels good though