diary of a wimpy bitch

the people’s princess

like if it’s not on theme enough or is too simple or looks like something for a basic award show then you must find something better that is approved if you want to attend because some of these looks give WH correspondents dinner not costume is art 🤨

your met gala ticket should be on hold pending outfit approval by the chairs

like YES I am hot and flirty in the city with my friends and my adult job in my adult apartment! I am samantha jones!!

my therapist said I’m living my Sex in the City years rn and it was the nicest thing anyone has said to me

People should start tailgating before movies. Firing up the grill in the AMC parking lot.

I really wish I was a woman of few words. Unfortunately, you will hear from me. 👍🏽

thinking about the matte blue scooby doo fruit snack

may this kind of email find me

On the helicopter leaving the ship right now. This planet is impossibly beautiful from every altitude I’ve seen it…surface to 250,000 miles

The Snow Miser and Heat Miser if they slayed

what happens if you’re on your period while you’re in space do you feel more connected to the moon or something

@EricLindquist former loyola guard part of that 2018 final four run. was with the memphis hustle for a few years and was traded to the windy city bulls a few weeks ago. he just signed a 10-day contract with the grizzlies and this was his nba debut game!

I watch/track/wager on the NBA every single day, and I don’t have any earthly idea what a ‘Lucas Williamson’ is. First time that’s happened in a while.

my bestie made his nba debut last night and scored his first nba points I was standing in front of the tv trying to take pics on my ipad looking like a proud mother 🥹

There are far too many fools for the day to be funny.

that’s so clit (crazy lit)

guy driving on michigan ave with all the windows down and reviving the engine nonstop while blasting wgft. it’s springtime in chicago baby

dadtok feels like gretchen trying to make fetch happen and it’s just never going to happen like pls give it up we’re tired #SLOMW

why are they gentrifying mahjong

born to listen to everyone’s acceptance speeches forced to listen to corny skits introducing nominees instead :(