ARE YOU STILL YOU?

i’m just going to rest for a while, okay?

the sacrificial lamb, josefa de óbidos. (1670-1684.)

to realize you were raised for meat must be heartbreaking. the hands that held you, doted on you, now lining a blade to your throat, hands far too steady to be doing this for the first time. to owe your flesh in exchange for love and care.

look at you go, crossin’ state lines with your shadow. tryna run away, change your zipcode —— turns out you’re still an asshole.

you’re putting money on red, i’m a sure bet at a losing streak.

i am a bad person trying very hard to be a good person.

so you walk eternally through the shadow realms, standing against evil where all others falter. may your thirst for retribution never quench, may the blood on your sword never dry, and may we never need you again.

i was strong but i was a child. i was a child. children should not have to fight to be young.

and who do you think i’ll be without you?

only memories, fading memories, blending into dull tableaux / i want them back.

if i had a wish, or even a choice, i’d wake up to the sound of your voice.

just cut me down the middle and count my rings.

if i packed the car and leave this town, will you notice that i’m not around?

the bravest thing i’ve ever done was to run away and hide. but not this time.

i thought that alcohol was just for those with nothing else to do / i thought that drinking just to get drunk was a waste of precious booze / but now i know that there’s a time and place where i can choose, to wipe the fine line between self—control and self—abuse.

i know we don’t live here anymore / we bought an old house on the danforth / she loves me, her body keeps me warm — AND I AM HAPPY HERE!

better not give in to it. it takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart.

you've got to go through it to get to the end of it.

you were capable of imagining a different future. and maybe it won’t be realized today, maybe not in our lifetime. maybe it will take generations. we’re all part of a continuum. does that make it pointless?

i had so much potential.

nothing you can take from me is ever worth keeping, and she is the most precious thing i’ve ever known.