jasmi 𝜗𝜚
1.1K posts
@ellie_vlr @rainssavl @ryotavlrnt @majusiaxx @MayaaaMeow @iLka1337 when ellie is on chamber and u know its free win🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑
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jasmi 𝜗𝜚 retweetledi
jasmi 𝜗𝜚 retweetledi
Every 3-6 months, especially after coaching a quick GC mix, I get hit with the random urge to play some VALORANT ranked again.
This session lasts always for max 10 ranked games.
Not because I don't want to queue anymore. But because I can't.
Riot will take away my ability to queue a competitive game for three to seven days every single time without failure.
Not because I am a toxic piece of shit.
But because I am the best possible teammate you can get in ranked.
Let me tell you the story.
I queue up and get Fracture including a Brimstone and Fade with no comms.
Perfect start. The more idiots I can't hear who would object to my perfect IGLing the better.
We start Attack 0-6.
That doesn't bother me at all because I know what I am capable of.
But it bothers my Neon a lot.
"MAN FUCK THIS SHIT I ALWAYS GET THE IDIOTS ON MY TEAM"
He speaks as if he is me. Disgusting.
But he fails to understand the concept that the enemy team has the same exact idiots and that this is even winnable on 0-12.
I tell him:
"Don't worry brother. Let's focus on what we can do." and continue to lead my team with my superior IGLing to the greatest comeback of all times.
The round after he clutches a 1v3.
I hype him up and we start building a bond together that will lead us to victory - me the supreme leader and my 93 IQ capped Neon doing everything I tell him to do.
Round after round I move him like a pawn and motivate him so he continues to do the dirty work for me.
Now it is 10-11 on defense.
"I told you so. It is always winnable MY BROTHER! Now let's close this one out."
However, I fail to clutch up the round after and my Neon then does the unthinkable.
He does the only thing that with absolute certainty will lose this game.
He opens his microphone and says "FUCK YOU CHAMBER YOU ARE SO FUCKING BAD" to me.
Unbelievable. Weren't we just best friends on the frontline making the impossible happen together?
HE WAS ONLY HERE BECAUSE OF ME.
He has betrayed the King.
This cannot go unpunished.
Now we all know how this story ends.
Before the game ends I will be having a notification pop up in the chat that I am restricted from using voice chat.
But before I can consider that option my primal instincts have already kicked in. Like a hyena chasing his prey down in the wild.
So I respond of course and let him know that I will personally make sure to put a sawed off shotgun in his mouth and pull the trigger infront of his entire family making their screams form a symphony that I will be listening to for all eternity.
I never stop. I won't stop talking until he has muted himself just like Brimstone and Fade.
And I always win that battle.
Because that battle to show the Kings authority has become more important to me than the war.
This is not me complaining about the Neon or the system against saying what you want that Riot has implemented.
I love it. It is a reminder that the real world where you can be truly yourself is way more beautiful.
If free speech would still exist I would still be playing VALORANT every single day probably having missed out on EVERY opportunity that life gave me.
Thank you, @riotgames
I will see this Neon again in 6 months when I queue up again.
I am sure of it.
Until then, as always: Time to be a better man than I was yesterday.
lexa@lexavalo
what happened to free speech in valorant
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@kamoyeess @natusvincere kamo 👨🏻💻 where 🤷🏼♀️ are 🧟♂️ you 🫵 looking 👀 bro ⁉️🤣😵
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jasmi 𝜗𝜚 retweetledi
Kamo you CANNOT be serious rn… what was that 🥶🥵
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jasmi 𝜗𝜚 retweetledi
