simonscat

@TfL is there a reason you’re trying to cook us on the Elizabeth Line every morning when you have working AC?

@TfL You need more Elizabeth Line services out to Reading at rush hour. Just spent over an hour stood like a sardine on a delayed, packed train, with people pushing people out of the way to get on and knocking people over. A horrible service.

Day 7 of our #SpicyXmas giveaway 🌶️🎄 Use a gif that describes how you feel when you think of Nando's for the chance to win a £35 Nando's gift card...

GIRL OF MY DREAMS tracklist fletcher.lnk.to/GOMDsave

for my next trick, I will survive on £10 till the end of September

I LEFT MY TEDDY IN MY ROOM AND THE HOUSEKEEPER DID THIS??;!;!;!!;!;

how the fuck are we half way through the year

Honestly one of the best nights of my life, thank you @findingfletcher for an absolutely fucking unreal performance.

Just had my first order from @pastaevangelist. Some of the best pasta I’ve had. 10/10 would recommend🍝🍝🍝

Just RT this post and make sure you’re following us for a chance to win this signed #BahrainGP plate! 🇧🇭 #HaasF1

@AmazingPhil Surely these 🌵 FANTESI 12 Pcs Cactus Candles, Handmade Cactus Succulent Cactus Tealight for Spa Home Party Wedding Decoration Gifts(Style 1) amazon.co.uk/dp/B07GD9GXR7/…

I can’t have a party so I’m doing a ‘viewers choose my birthday presents’ video! Tweet me a product link to a nice or funny gift for me (UK shops in £ plz) and ..someone will get and wrap them up for my surprise! Any money spent will be matched for charity too 🥳🎁

“I’m here for a good time, not a long time” between Covid and climate change, you’re here for neither

‘I will never financially recover from this’ - literally everyone after leaving a Christmas market.

why does daylight always need saving? girl get help

oh go on then, it’s Christmas