#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #118: During conversations, mispronounce every person’s name. If they correct you, just nod and continue doing it.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #117: Ask the bartender if it’s okay to have a pizza delivered to the bar. Ask other customers if they would like some pizza. Do not order pizza.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #112: Explain the rules of a game nobody is playing.

@Dear_Booze #SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #201

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #106: Ask what time it is. Reject the answer on principle.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #104: Announce that you only have time for “two more” before you start your shift as an Uber driver.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #102: Say “watch this” with zero plan. Commit anyway.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #94: Say “I’ll just close out now.” Order two more while closing out.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #92: When heading to the restroom, ask another to watch your drink. Then have him sign a napkin because he will become your drink’s “temporary legal guardian.”

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #91: Attempt a toast that becomes a speech that begins to ramble. Quit before you get to the point. Then say “Ahh fuck it” and take a sip.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #85: Compliment the bartender’s “craft” when he opens a can or bottle.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #81: Sit down at bar and study the bottles on the shelf. Ask the bartender “what’s good here?”

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #80 Randomly high-five a stranger mid-conversation

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #79: Sing along with the jukebox. Make up your own lyrics. Perform them with authority

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #77: With each fresh drink the bartender places in front of you, salute it like it’s your commanding officer.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #24: When someone asks you a question, look offended and reply, "I''m not a communist!"

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #10: Work "...when I was in med school..." into conversations. Do the same with "...when I was in law school..."

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #50: Play a very random song on the juke box and declare it to be the song you want played at your funeral.

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #71: Order your next drink like it's a secret. Look back and forth and over your shoulder as you lean closer to the bartender and whisper "I'll have another."

#SpringBreakDayDrinkingTips #67: Say “I love you, man” to someone who just stepped on your shoe.