adraV sengA 🍉

mls x.com/xz_jg11/status…

Religious people will describe heaven as a classless, stateless, moneyless society with no private property, no suffering, and everyone’s needs met, then turn around and call communism evil. It will never stop being funny.

@theawayfans If only Alan Pardew played Football Manager 2005, he would have known

Carlos Tevez: "When we finished playing the 2006 World Cup, Masche and I went to West Ham. On our very first day, the coach at the time, Alan Pardew, called us over with a translator and said: 'To be honest, I didn't ask for you guys.' "The translator turned completely red and told us the coach didn't even know who we were: 'What position do you play?' "We had just finished playing in the World Cup — it was insane. We knew right then we weren't going to play a single game under that guy."

@Lana_Florea @WelBeast Pretty sure opposition managers are delighted to see Ben White start.

@WelBeast Pretty sure if they could get him back they would. I don't mind them misleading us about timescales, I'd rather be kept in the dark if it means opposition managers don't know who to prepare to play against

Jurrien Timber’s a matter of days have turned into 7 weeks and are now approaching 2 months. What the heck happened to him?

@AFCAMDEN Or start Saka and get Madueke/Dowman on later

Think Mikel needs to change it up on Saturday. Both full-backs, Norgaard/MLS in midfield and Jesus up top. Thought Madueke looked closer to his early season form so he can go again. Partly rotating but partly to get freshness into the team after an intense game last night.

@afcstuff @MARCAinENGLISH This is the most ridiculous new thing. It's the floor mate. Rice does it just behind him

Diego Simeone reacts angrily after Ben White steps on the Atletico Madrid crest on his way to the tunnel. 🤬🇦🇷 🎥 @MARCAinENGLISH

Lol, this is so good and so brutal

@DSEDunn You are describing situations of danger/violence and car dependency that simply do not occur to Europeans :)

So. If you are in ANY emergency situation — let’s say you park in your driveway, & only as you begin taking your groceries from the car, you see movement in your home that is supposed to be empty. And a broken window. You cannot drive away to somewhere safer to get help. Your car refuses. You are at a traffic light. Suddenly someone is trying to get into your car (this has happened to me). You have a split second to accelerate & leave him in the dust. Your car shuts down power. The school calls. Your daughter has fainted. You cannot drive to the school to pick her up because your car notices your eyes are wide & you’re breathing fast. Your car now controls whether you live or die in an emergency situation. And those controls cannot be overridden.

@EverydayAFC_ If you choose to see the positive, it's a little more rest before the first leg and a little more rest for West Ham

🚨Jamie Carragher on Arsenal’s brutal schedule: 🗣️“I feel Arsenal have been really unfortunate. Playing Champions League semi-finals Wednesday then Tuesday means three games in six days instead of eight. That’s a massive difference at this stage of the season. They’ve got to go away to Atletico, travel back, face a decent Fulham side, then go again on Tuesday night. Three games in six days is really tough.” Do you agree with Carra here when he says it's a brutal schedule for Arsenal? [Sky Sports] #AFC

Amazing nickname like generational

@football_pb Very low wages + hard to recoup the transfer fee. He's an automatic keep I think

@MaramKevin forgot Dowman but Noni is far from untouchable

Next season these are the only players I would definitely keep in the squad: Raya; Gabriel, Saliba, Timber, Hincapie, Mosquera, Salmon; Merino, Nwaneri, Rice, Zubimendi Eze; Saka

I really loathe restaurant reservation culture. It favors the "fascistic planners" over the "whimsical flâneurs" like myself.

@AlecStapp Don't even have to be a computer scientist to figure this out, that's just working out a problem

Just remembered the story about a computer scientist who had his bike stolen and tried to explain binary search to a cop

@GAltringham Axiom by Jöns Jönsson Exil by Visar Morina Talking about the weather by Annika Pinske Strange Little Cat by Ramon Zürcher Afire by Christian Petzold The forest for the trees by Maren Ade Atlas by David Nawrath The Teachers’ Lounge by Ilker Çatak

Name a great German movie that isn't Metropolis or M

@Rory_Talks_Ball Basically only need to win the next 3 PL games as well.

We’re 3 Champions League games and 6 Premier League games away from the most successful season in our history If you can’t get behind the team now, why did you ever bother supporting in the first place?

We only got like 10 new sentences left

@TouchlineX It's going to be an awkward first 10 minutes of the second half then. I hope Chris Martin can drop the shoulder from the half space

🚨 𝗡𝗘𝗪: For the first time in history, The World Cup Final will have a halftime show. It will be organized by Chris Martin & Coldplay and could take up to 25 minutes.

@ArsenalRadar White can't play all those games in a row, Mosquera starts tonight. I also think Norgaard should play to rest Zubi for Sunday. And that 3 runners front three doesn't work. Kinda needs Trossard or Dowman for balance

Arsenal XI vs Sporting CP #ucl