Nathan Bryce

Wow, 15 years ago today I joined Twitter. My how time flies.

Have you ever experienced the violent quake that rattles your entire house when the bathtub's water faucet is turned on to a certain point?

What are Preparation A thru Preparation G?

Stress is the confusion created when your mind overrides your body's basic desire to choke the life out of someone who really deserves it.

Anybody who doesn't cut his speed at the sight of a police car is probably parked.

Let's make like a nut and bolt.

I just published a new blog post: thenexusquest.com/the-four-tempe… 🎉 The Four Temperaments and Their Perception of Time 😍 #thenexusquest

What's the difference between a conservative and a liberal? Well, if you're drowning 50 feet offshore, a conservative will throw you a 25 foot rope, hold on, and tell you to swim for it. A liberal will throw you a 100 foot rope, then rush off to do more good works.

The White House Christmas decor includes more than 30 trees and 3,405 ornaments, many of them edible. The fun part is watching the President figure out which ones.

Sometimes I am guilty of carperpetuation, which is the act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

Writing tip: There is one cheap gimmick that should be avoided at all costs.............. suspense.

Why is it that for the first time in history, one bag of groceries produces two bags of trash?

Objectivity is in the eye of the beholder.

Old programmers never die, they just go to bits.

Why do they can soda at a bottling plant?

Old cashiers never die, they just check out.

Have you ever noticed that when you tell someone you're on your way, you're suddenly in a race against time to actually get there? It's like the clock starts ticking the moment you hit "send."

I would enjoy the day much more if it began later.

I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.

I don't blame Congress. If I had trillions of dollars at my disposal, I'd be irresponsible too.