Stu, For Real

Et tu, fuckface

Eye-catching. Like fish hook

I'm no vegetarian, but I really don't think we should be eating penguins, man.

An alter ego? in this economy?

I don't know who Clavicular is but every time i see that word I think people are talking about someone's collar bone

Maybe Chuck Norris just had to go fight all of our demons.

Encyclopedia Britannica and Merriam Webster have just sued Sam Altmans OpenAI. These legendary publishers accuse OpenAI of stealing nearly 100000 copyrighted articles and dictionary entries to train ChatGPT. The AI now copies their content freely while crushing their website traffic and revenue that built centuries of real knowledge. This is not innovation or progress. This is blatant industrial scale theft from the guardians of human knowledge. Sam Altman preaches ethics and safety while building his empire on plagiarism and lies. The lawsuits are only getting started.

Chuck Norris didn't die, we did.

as my wife tells me about her day i squeeze my eyes shut tight, so tight that not even god can get in & i think about sitting atop a tire-sized chimichanga floating down a river of chile verde & into the gaping mouth of a dinosaur-sized elvis presley as he sings don’t be cruel.

Chuck Norris didn’t die. Heaven just needed a new sheriff. RIP Chuck — thanks for bringing so many laughs to the dad joke culture.

Afroman just gave us the official permission we didn’t even know we needed: if it’s wrong, roast the F out of it.

*174,908 b.c.* caveman 1: it came to me in a dream last night, so i built it. i call it the automated teller machine. theoretically, it can be an easy way to deposit, withdraw or transfer money. caveman 2: why does it say insufficient funds?

Super Sky Point to Death, which has been Chuck Norris’d. You have to respect any man so proficient at kicking motherfuckers in the face he required special jeans. St. Peter, I hope you know how to duck. #RIP

My first act as President will be to designate an hour a day to bullying podcasters.

No one says "Heavens to Murgtroyd" anymore.

Chuck Norris didn't pass away. He intimidated the grim reaper into giving him a piggyback ride to heaven.

Boyfriend: Fun fact, there are no canaries on Canary Island Me: what about the Virgin Islands? Boyfriend: nope, no canaries there either

When life gives her lemons she makes lemon loaf and cookies for everyone.

She’s a 10 but otherwise ideal

Once upon a Twitter we used to retweet each other.

Have you tried sitting on the edge of the bed about it