Stewart

@MelbourneFL Does Melbourne have a flag?

My laundry controls my life

The Humpty Dumpty poem does not say that Humpty Dumpty is an egg. Why tf is he an egg?

This guy doesn’t deserve the love of a pit bull twitter.com/dogbitelaw/sta…

can’t say i love the green in tri-colored pasta... perhaps a subtle navy? thanks

I made a resolution to floss. And I did it. 12:01, January 1st. BAM! Blood everywhere.

Sunsets on I-4 make me want to be a truck driver

You can also squeeze it gently and the sides will pop open allowing for even faster cooling twitter.com/simpnmild/stat…

If you don’t tip 20% then you’re 20% asshole

Like I want to move up north when I graduate but a world without Publix chocolate milk and Publix cookies and Publix chicken tender subs just seems so dark.

if heat rises then why is the north pole so cold ? 🤔

Is it weird for me to ask friends if I can walk their dog?

Zaxby’s is in its own league

You know it’s gonna be a good netflix original when the title sequence is 10 minutes long

*garggled a mouthful of ciroc on the way to prom* twitter.com/rosehips__/sta…

When I️ was a kid my mom sat me down for a serious talk and I️ thought I­t was the sex talk but she just told me all the facts about global warming

“We bought too much zoo.”