David Carson

This week's episode on Apple: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/put…

I watched videos of Punch the baby monkey for hours last week. Not just on tiktok, the whole video universe of Punch the motherless monkey. At one point, I even whispered "you got this, little guy" at my phone, alone in my living room, like the monkey could hear me through the glass and would be comforted by the support of a man in unwashed sweatpants. Meanwhile, there were six thousand GoFundMes for actual human crises live on the internet, and I didn't even click "see more." I didn't whisper encouragement to a single stranger's chemo update. I am a person who would offer a pep talk to a primate but won't even scroll slowly past a stranger in need. It makes you feel like a glitchy person. Like your soul has a "skip ad" button when it sees humans in need because your brain starts asking logical, cold questions like "is this a scam?" or "is someone else already helping?" But you see a dog with a sad violin soundtrack and your brain just screams, "TAKE MY HOUSE." I’d like to think I’m not heartless. That I just have a very specific, furry-shaped, doe-eyed blind spot. I don’t think I’m alone in this. We’d rather care about a creature that will never fill out a tax return than a person who lives down the street. It’s an evolutionary error where we've decided that if a tragedy doesn't have paws, it’s basically just a statistic. My latest dumbify episode is a support group for anyone who has ever felt more emotional resonance with a cute motherless monkey than a coworker. I’m looking at the actual data behind why a dog in an ad raises twice as much money as a dying child. It turns out our empathy system has a very small, very leaky bucket. And Understanding why it leaks, and why we’re all suckers for a pair of wet doe-y eyes, is the only way to actually start acting like the "higher species" we claim to be. Link in the comments 👀👇

This week's episode on Spotify: open.spotify.com/episode/1DilTS…

Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the…

I had a terrifying realization while watching my 17-year-old daughter laugh hysterically at a video of a dying deep-sea anglerfish. She wasn’t laughing at the fish, because that would require a very specific, troubling kind of darkness. She was laughing at the comments. It turns out, the internet is basically a museum where we all just sprint past the paintings so we can read the graffiti in the bathroom. I used to think the person making the video was the artist, but really, a video is just a designated meeting spot for anonymous strangers to be way funnier than the person who spent forty hours making it. Content isn't the main course anymore. It’s just the little paper tray that holds the comment section. On the latest episode of Dumbify, I explore why the anonymous heckler in the comments is actually the most important creative force alive today. And apparently, there is 2,400 years of historical proof backing this up, involving professional fake-criers in 1820s Paris and a guy who kept 320 isolated human laughs padlocked in a wooden box. If you’ve ever felt a deep, existential guilt about spending two hours lurking in the replies instead of doing anything "productive," I have some excellent news for you. You aren't wasting time. You might actually be doing the most culturally significant work of our generation. Give it a listen to find out why leaning into your inner lurker actually makes you a modern-day genius. Link in the comments 👇

Spotify: open.spotify.com/episode/1NfRje…

@daremarket @SolJakey @chooserich If overconfidence was a dress code

Best caption gets $100

wisdom from Kevin Kelly open.spotify.com/episode/6YLe0V…

I found a word today called "Pronoia" and now it is vibrating in my brain like a bee in a jar. It is the opposite of paranoia. Paranoia is when you think the barista spelled your name wrong on purpose to dismantle your ego. Pronoia is the suspicion that the universe is actually a massive secret conspiracy designed specifically to help you win. It is thinking that traffic jams are just the world protecting you from arriving somewhere too early and being awkward. I have decided to adopt this worldview because I am tired of thinking the squirrels are organizing a coup against my credit score. In this week's episode we explore this concept because it turns out believing everyone is out to save you is a much funnier way to live than hiding under a weighted blanket waiting for the sky to fall. We also talk about Kevin Kelly who is a very smart man who spent his life acting like a helpless toddler for science. He hitchhiked to work every day just to see if the universe would catch him. He knocked on random doors and asked to sleep in backyards and instead of getting arrested he got ice cream. He calls it "The Art of Being Kinded" but I call it Professional Mooching. The science actually says that when you ask a stranger for help you are giving them a blast of dopamine in their brain. So really if you refuse to ask for help you are hoarding all the happiness chemicals for yourself and that is selfish. Come listen to the episode and learn how to be a burden on society in a way that makes everyone feel like a hero. It is the only responsible thing to do. podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the…

IYKYK Linkle.fun Daily #82 - Jan 29, 2026 Easy ✅ Hard ✅ Impossible ✅ 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 3 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 3 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 2

Yesterday, I dropped my pen on the floor. Instead of bending over to pick it up like a functioning member of society, I spent a solid two minutes trying to pinch it between my toes while keeping my butt firmly planted in the chair I was sitting on. I looked like a gargoyle practicing ballet. My hamstrings were trembling, I was sweating, and I probably burned more calories struggling to stay seated than I would have if I'd just stood up. My wife walked in, watched this pathetic display of "toe dexterity," and sighed. But while she saw a grown man failing to be a person, I realized I was actually engaging in an evolutionary biological imperative. Because it turns out this specific type of defective behavior is actually the key to world domination. This week on Dumbify, I'm exploring how "laziness" can be a competitive advantage. If you've ever felt guilty for finding the easy way out, this episode is for you because science and captains of industry say it's a sign of superior intelligence. Let's get dumb: open.spotify.com/episode/1y7tSs…

Did I mention I also nailed the speed round? Linkle.fun Bonus Speed Round ⏱️ :50 🟥🟥🟥 🟥🟥🟥 🟥🟥🟥

I kinda ruled today. Linkle.fun Daily #79 - Jan 26, 2026 Easy ✅ Hard ✅ Impossible ✅ 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 1 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 1 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 1

Feels like I just barely made it through today’s puzzles. Linkle.fun Daily #78 - Jan 25, 2026 Easy ✅ Hard ✅ Impossible ✅ 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 2 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 3 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 2

TOUGH Linkle day! Linkle.fun Daily #77 - Jan 24, 2026 Easy ❌ Hard ✅ Impossible ❌ 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟪🟪 🟩🟩🟩 Nope. 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Solved in 2 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟪🟪🟩 Nope.

→ be Daisuke Inoue → spawn in Osaka → go to school “to sleep” → pick drums because “all you have to do is hit them” → can’t read music → learn songs by repetition + vibes → play bars/clubs around Kobe → notice the real stars are the businessmen → they LOVE singing along (badly) → get invited on a company trip to play accompaniment → can’t go → make a tape instead → tape works → brain lights up → “wait… we can sell absence” → build 11 homemade boxes (1971) → amp + mic + coin box + 8-track car stereo → lease them to bars → week one: nobody touches them → deploy a decoy singer to kickstart the shame → suddenly everyone wants the mic → machines spread Kobe, Osaka, Tokyo, everywhere → end up making ~25,000 units → told to patent it → don’t → because: “it's silly” → bigger companies copy it → you don’t get rich → karaoke becomes global religion → key insight: people weren’t looking for good music → they were looking for permission → to be publicly terrible together → win the Ig Nobel Peace Prize → for giving humans “an entirely new way… to tolerate each other”

@zarazhangrui Magic Path is super solid

What’s the best tool for vibe designing?

We are all terrified that AI is going to replace us because it is efficient and we are just bags of water with anxiety. But my new Dumbify episode is about why being a "bad computer" is actually your superpower. open.spotify.com/episode/4zxuaU…

@EspreeDevora Slipstream Music 💯

What are the best royalty free music sites you recommend?

I'm diving into the genius of "strategic parental neglect." Why constant attention and intervention might actually be making your children weaker, not stronger, and why doing less for them could make them capable of more. 🎧 Listen now. Let's get dumb. podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sto…