dooooom

@JakeLang Why are your pants so tight? You look like a six year old

I’m currently being arrested outside the Minnesota State Capitol for turning the “PROSECUTE ICE” sign the Democrats erected Into the wonderful “PRO ICE” 🧊❤️

Wanna know how to score chicks? Go to a party, turn on school of rock, quote as many lines as you can. It’s literally that easy.

@SoldierField speakers LOUDER

Favorite actor Dennehy, favorite pope LEO

They should do one of these hotspot maps for where I’ve rammed Divvy bikes into bad drivers’ cars

@NickJFuentes Didn’t you shit your pants during the gym mile at LTHS?

Your body, my choice. Forever.

Certainly not goin to sleep til dj plays pepas

this should be illegal

Keep your juices in the bratS

keep your juices in the brats

no place I’d rather be than sitting on a bench outside of the Tiburon CVS eating a bag of Cheez-It’s

Corned beef in the instant pot and potatoes in the air fryer. Just like in the old country 🥰☘️

icymi school of rock is back on netflix

Not a cop

Where are the sideshows at in SF tonight

I had a couple ales tonight

@wemaloney If roommates mom never sent you an advent calendar she hates you

No holiday gift from the company but room mate’s sent candy and that’s what matters

Get her in the pit!

My mom keeps asking me to fastpass Turnstile songs on touch tunes at the bar

Surely we’ll see a bounce back year from him