E R I C ║

Dating in 2026 is hilarious. She wants a 6'5" guy who makes 6 figures, has therapy-speak, and doesn't watch porn. Bro, the math isn't mathing. Y'all are filtering out 99% of men and wondering why you're single at 32.

Failed a job interview last week. Apparently a gangbang isn't proof you can work in a team.

liquor taste better when ya life a lil fucked up 😂

Friend: “aye this weed good right?” Me:

Man saw his mechanic cruising with his car

Man to Man: Having high testosterone will literally make you more handsome.

This month btw 💔

Thave such a good heart.. I don't deserve half the things I've put up with

I bet British people be having sex like: Mmm yes splendid, ah indeed. Scrumptious carry on, good heavens I'm arriving.

"Home Alone" was released in 1990 and they paid $122.50 for 10 pizzas. I just tried to order 10 pizzas just to see the cost. It's was $122.29... No inflation on large pizzas

Me trying to explain that men definitely have the self-discipline not to cheat or sleep around. They are some of the most disciplined people; many go to the gym every day, are super strict with their diets, and put their goals before intimate relationships. It's more common to hear about a woman dropping her career to support her man so he can pursue his goals. It's rare to hear a man doing that because they have enough self-control and discipline to prioritize their goals.

My coworker smoked weed while she was pregnant with her baby up until she was seven months now he is 3 y/o & won't talk. Nigga still high

Be ready for hate — that's the point. Controversy = impressions

Every snack feels earned when you're high 🌿😂

Body wants sex, heart wants love, Mind wants money.. i jus wnna smoke thou.

Smoking weed disconnects you from the spiritual world Stoners THINK it’s the opposite Because they get mildly psychedelic on it But the proof is in dreams You can’t dream when you smoke weed And dreams are the most common connection to the spiritual world Castrating drug.

I was in the weed store The day after my dad died, my friend that lost her dad 2 month before mine called and the first thing she said was “hi orphan” 😭🤣 I laugh cried

Ngl People be smoking weed nowadays like its a cigarette

Drug tested by doctor, popped for weed, and now I have lost my adderall prescription. What can I do now?

Smoking dispensary weed is equivalent to eating McDonalds and thinking you're getting real food.