Valerie Hynes

I want to share this morning’s newsletter, because I think a lot of people need to hear it. I want to talk to the women today. Men, don’t go anywhere. You’ll learn something. But this message is for the women because I want to answer one of the most common emails we receive — and it manages to give me hope, but also make me worry: “I want to know how I do it when I am a menopausal woman.” (You can insert peri or post here, also.) First, let me tell you why it gives me hope. Seeing so many women embracing the idea of fitness and resistance training is something I’ve fought for my whole life.  Watch this clip of me on Johnny Carson more than 40 years ago, when I had much more beautiful hair, trying to convince women to pick up weights: youtu.be/Y4OXujrjcRk?si… I’ve been fighting this fight for decades. For 40 years, the message has been the same: women should train. Women should be strong. Women are capable of incredible things when they step into the gym and stop listening to all the garbage about what they can’t do. It took the world 40 years to catch up with me. Maybe that makes me stubborn, or maybe it makes me right. I think it’s both. Now, let me tell you why it worries me. I talk about how deciding who you want to be a lot here. Your identity is important. I don’t want you to just train, I want you to become someone who trains, someone who is strong. So when you tell me that you are someone with menopause or perimenopause, I see you starting to define yourself as someone with limits, and that’s what I want to avoid. Before we start, I want to acknowledge something about us men: we are not exactly known for overthinking. We just do the thing, sometimes badly, and figure it out later. This is probably why we have shorter lifespans than women, so I’m not recommending it as a life strategy. But there is one benefit to not overthinking: you don’t give problems more power than they deserve. And that’s exactly what I’m seeing happen to millions of women right now. Everywhere I look, I see women describing themselves as “peri,” “meno,” or “post.” I see it in bios. I see it in introductions. I see it in the way women talk about themselves when they join the Pump Club. “I’m perimenopausal, so I probably can’t…” “I’m menopausal, so I’ll never be able to…” “I’m postmenopausal, so it’s too late for me to…” I need you to stop right there. Menopause is real. I am not dismissing it for a second. The hot flashes, the terrible sleep, the mood changes, the belly fat that shows up uninvited and refuses to leave — I’ve heard it all from thousands of women, and I believe every word of it. But here’s where I have a problem: When did a phase of your biology become your identity? When did a hormonal change become a life sentence? When did “this is harder now” turn into “this is impossible”? I’ll tell you when. It happened because an entire industry figured out they could make money off of your fear. They sold you special menopause workouts. Special menopause diets. Special menopause supplements.  And with every special product, they sent you the same message: “You are broken, and you need a special fix.” You are not broken. You don’t need a special fix. You need the same thing every single human being needs: a vision, a plan, consistency, and people who believe in you. That’s it. When I hear women say they can’t get strong because of menopause, I have to push back because I’ve been pushing back against these lies for longer than some of you have been alive. But I don’t want you to listen to me. I’m Arnold. Of course I’m going to tell you to train. That’s what I do. I want you to listen to women like you… 1/2