soph

@_ssyyyydd why am i the only person on the road that passed their driving test????

it’s so fun how every driver on the road is fucking braindead

if gordon ramsay is hosting im watching idc if its all the same cooking show just different fonts

found out this morning my most quiet dr LOVES tfb and even went to see brian play his solo show downtown (i was too sick to go😭)…he is so cool to me now he’s like an enigma i don’t care to crack lmao

pickles really starting to acquire a le epic bacon vibe

“your appt was cancelled the dr is sick” “omg i drove all this way! i wish somebody notified me!” ”we sent a message last night about the cancellation “well i saw that but i didn’t read it!😡” this is the reason front desk is mean at the drs office..bc some of u are stupid😪

@deathxgasm it was still 50% so i bought it today 🥳

my mom has “never heard of” tiny desk concerts😭

@BelugaJames @deathxgasm unfortunately they’re anonymous 😔 probably for this reason ..

@l0singteeth @deathxgasm Stab them next time they come in

literallllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy go fuck yourself what does my septum have to do with your care process😭😭

@deathxgasm like i work in primary care it was probably some old fuck😭

@deathxgasm fuckin pt survey comments for the month😂 bitch who asked you abt my septum?? they ask if i was nice and efficient during check in not if you like my piercings😭 and to top it off the my coworker ALSO has her septum lmao

the thing abt living in the south is, whether you know it or not, you’re always craving a cookout burger

@deathxgasm i was convinced i’d hate it but we have verrryyyyyy similar body types and now im like fuck i might look good in that😩

@deathxgasm this makes me want to try it on..and i made a very firm point to not try that one specifically

today i purchased a singular bottle of fresca…was anYbody going to tell me they make bottle fresca and i don’t have to buy a 2L or mini bottles..WAS ANYBODY GOING TO SAY ANYTHING AT ALL?????

FUCK YOU PROJECT HAIL MARY FUCK YOU DISHEVELED RYAN GOSLING FUCK THAT MOVIE AWFUL MOVIE I HOPE IT WINS ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING

i’ve had this ph# since i was in 5th grade

i hate when espn sends me mad-libs

@myahcklemore it would be so fun to be a normie and actually think this was slam poetry and not automatically clock it as jacks mannequin/something corporate lol

“insane poetry” and it’s dark blue by jacks mannequin

This is insane they literally do this every time oh my god.