Joe

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Joe

Joe

@sandjoeman

Asshole 👨‍🍳

Mick's couch เข้าร่วม Şubat 2013
1.5K กำลังติดตาม2.2K ผู้ติดตาม
ทวีตที่ปักหมุด
Joe
Joe@sandjoeman·
Girl, you’ve got the face of an aardvark. Maybe sit this one out with your political views.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
ashley noelle
ashley noelle@ash_isawitch·
You’d be a lot cuter if you had coffee.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Willie
Willie@FrankieBuIIshit·
My ducks aren’t in a row, they’re not even related.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Marcmywords
Marcmywords@Marcmywords2·
Autocorrect changed sex tape to mix tape, so looks like I’ll be masturbating to the sweet sounds of Taylor, Alanis, and Adele… this could take a while.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Cabo 🍳🇺🇸
Cabo 🍳🇺🇸@Shot_Of_Cabo·
Put a penny in your mouth and we'll call it copper head.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Carmella Cannoli
Carmella Cannoli@piccolobutt·
I’m out of chocolate milk and that’s a real concern.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
you already know
you already know@DrinkingDad_2·
I absolutely will judge someone by what they name their dog.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
尺乇乃乇ccム
尺乇乃乇ccム@cheeky__gal·
Easter had us wearing a bonnet like we were headed to church in 1892.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Bitz
Bitz@bitzydimbo·
the only thing better than a bacon cheeseburger is a bacon cheeseburger calzone.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Horatio Quartzjixler
Horatio Quartzjixler@Quartzjixler·
Have you ever met someone with a standing desk that you didn't want to slap at least once?
English
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Horatio Quartzjixler
Horatio Quartzjixler@Quartzjixler·
"Whose pussy is this?" is actually a pretty common question down at the Fleshlight factory.
English
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Carmella Cannoli
Carmella Cannoli@piccolobutt·
Daily affirmation: You’re not the best looking but also not the ugliest.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Marcmywords
Marcmywords@Marcmywords2·
I don't care what the stripper told you, Google Search is not a substitute for an education.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
𝓜𝓮𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓲𝓮
Older men don’t care about your wrinkles, they wanna know about the flexibility of your personality and your holes.
English
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
🇨🇦𖤐 Father Red McGee 𖤐 🇨🇦
Being thin is sexy. Being thick is sexy. Being the human vessel for a 6000 year demon is sexy.
English
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
尺乇乃乇ccム
尺乇乃乇ccム@cheeky__gal·
Welcome to your 40s, where everyone you know is either married, divorced, or on a CPAP machine.
English
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
X🇨🇦
X🇨🇦@FFmaxhyde·
The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any. ~Alice Walker
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Darla
Darla@ddsmidt·
I say “I’m not a spring chicken anymore“ a lot, given the fact I’ve never actually been a spring chicken.
English
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
𝓜𝓮𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓲𝓮
𝓜𝓮𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓲𝓮@MelDutchie·
I knew you were hacked when you asked me how I was doing.
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11
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Horatio Quartzjixler
Horatio Quartzjixler@Quartzjixler·
What Twitter really needs is a button that mass blocks people who have virtue signaling "flags du jour" in their bios.
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Joe รีทวีตแล้ว
Carmella Cannoli
Carmella Cannoli@piccolobutt·
If you joined this app when it was called X, please do not refer to yourself as OG.
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