Shelley

Give your kids a smart phone when you’re ready for their childhood to end.

Yeah, last season he was a pixie-dust spreader on the Tilt-O-Whirl. He thinks that maybe next year, he'll be guessing people's weight or barking for the Yak woman.

@spsandridge @KevOnStage And Ohio State ❤️👀

I don’t know how the committee puts a 1 loss Bama over FSU like some of yall been saying. FSU won their conference and went undefeated.

#BROWNS WIN! It’s a miracle!!!!!

If someone says, "Let's grab coffee sometime!" and then doesn't immediately pull out their phone to schedule it, (phones now come with calendars, it's crazy) they don't want to grab coffee. They just don't know how to say the phrase "It's nice to run into you, have a great day!"

I know this “Quarterback” series on Netflix is good because they got me interested inKirk Cousins.

This Hillsong mini series 🥴🥹

@ianmorgancron 9. .. Peace. .. Just the peace.

What Enneagram type do you resonate with the most and why?

if you deconstructed yourself out of being hype for this you deconstructed too hard. seek God.

DON’T 👏🏼 CALL 👏🏼 YOURSELF 👏🏼 A 👏🏼 CHRISTIAN 👏🏼 IF 👏🏼 YOU 👏🏼 DON’T 👏🏼 KNOW 👏🏼 WHAT 👏🏼 THE 👏🏼 LIFEHOUSE 👏🏼 SKIT 👏🏼 IS 👏🏼

@FitFounder Working out

What’s something that has improved your mental health that you wish you started doing earlier?

Everybody tryna see if Rihanna pregnant again

why is sleeping at night so hard but sleeping in the morning is like drifting away on a soft fluffy cloud while adele sings you a lullaby

People who are married, have kids, have a job AND manage to exercise, I have questions Let’s start with a simple one HOW.

I love a fresh start.

And when Santa squeezes his fat, white ass down that chimney tonight, he's going to find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse!

You know that metal plate in my head? I had to have it replaced because every time Catherine revved up the microwave I’d piss my pants and forget who I was for a half hour or so.

Thanks @taylorswift13 for spending 1,170 minutes with me in 2022. I couldn’t stop listening to the 1. #SpotifyWrapped open.spotify.com/artist/06HL4z0…

when the rules of literally any card game are explained to me

Every Sunday I’m faced with the decision to be the healthiest person alive or eat and drink everything on earth.