System 36 (The Architect) 📊

There is a specific type of I miss you text that only comes when her Data Subscription is at 1%. ​You think it’s Romance, but it’s actually a Financial Notification. Once the alert hits, she will miss you again next month. 🤡💸

When my all my friends start to Dey talk about babe like this, I go just Shutup Dey look them cuz I no fit relate😂💔 chai

A good friend will never hide a good money making opportunity from you.

@pakipakitoire ドラマの第1話始まってて草。この後どうなった？

新幹線の前の席の人俺のツイート見てる‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

@pakipakitoire これが令和の『運命の出会い』か…

@pakipakitoire 今すぐそのツイートに『いいね』押して反応見ようぜｗ

@pakipakitoire Hmmm

@BULONMAF Hand

@BULONMAF Ask Lobistars

@BULONMAF 🤣🤣

The fastest way to realize you are actually broke in this Lagos is to go to the Island for a quick lunch with people who post soft life' on Instagram. ​One bottle of water is ₦3,000. ​My brother, if your account name is not The Bank, stay in your house and fry yam. 🥂📉

@BULONMAF I go manage them E no too much

@BULONMAF Oya nah Help me find 3

@BULONMAF 😂😂

I’ve finally realized that some of my friends are not actually my friend, they are financial saboteurs sent from the village to finish my savings. 🙆‍♂️ ​Last weekend, the squad called me. Omo, let's just go and grab a light lunch, catch up, and chill. ​In my mind, light lunch means maybe ₦10k or ₦15k max. I dressed simple, entered my car, and drove to this fancy place on the Island. ​Mistake Number One. I reach there, the menu is looking like a WAEC syllabus. One plate of pasta is ₦25,000. Water is ₦3,000. Before I could even say Abeg, bring me ordinary Coke, my friends had already ordered three bottles of expensive wine and platters that looked like a sacrifice to the gods. ​The catching up started. One person is talking about his new sugar mummy, another is talking about the car he wants to buy (but hasn't seen the money yet). Everyone is snapping pictures for Instagram, looking like lagos big boys. ​Then the bill arrived. ₦450,000. For light lunch. ​The table went silent. Suddenly, everyone started looking at their phones. One person said, Ah, my OPay is acting up. Another said, 'Wait, let me call my accountant. ​Omo, I just sat there looking at my ₦25k pasta that didn't even full my belle. I realized that 80% of the people living the life on your timeline are actually one split bill away from a heart attack. ​I ended up paying a huge chunk just to save face and leave that place. As I was driving home, I was calculating how many crates of eggs and liters of fuel that money would have bought me. ​Lessons from the street: ​Budget is not a Sin: If they say lunch, ask for the location and check the menu on Google Maps first. If the water is more than ₦500, stay in your house and fry yam. ​Instagram is a Lie: Don't let someone's soft life post make you break your bank. Most of them are sharing the bill into 10 places. ​Know your Circle: Real friends will understand when you say Omo, that place too cost, make we find one better buka. ​I’m currently on a social media fast for my bank account. If you see me in your DM asking for urgent 2k, just know it’s because of that lunch. 😭 ​Abeg, who else has friends that like to order like Billionaires but pay like Interns? Or am I the only one surviving this fake life pressure? 🏃‍♂️💨👇

@BULONMAF My mummy good beat me

@BULONMAF 😂😂

@razrblyde Hi I fb I'm active I don't just follow, I also engage. Check my post, my mutuls are enjoying 😉

Under 5M Impression all accounts Drop a simple - Hii We boost YOU.🍏🍎