Jamie Lance

You’ve been running a program you didn’t install. Most of us have. The beliefs about success, what you’re supposed to want, how much is enough — a lot of that was written before you were old enough to question any of it. I’m a writer and former mental health worker from a working-class background. I write about finding that source code. The inherited patterns. The unquestioned scripts. The assumptions so old they start to feel like your actual personality. More in The Reframe. Link in bio.

@thought_harbor That’s for sure Dave. It’s not always easy letting them make mistakes, but it makes them more resilient when they’re adults.

@thereframe_ Parents need to let kids learn on their own. Facing hard times helps them grow. It's good for kids to make mistakes and find their own way. Love means letting them try and struggle sometimes.

Some parents can't let their kids struggle because watching it activates something unresolved in themselves. It's not about the child — it's about what the struggle reminds them of. They step in too quickly. The intention is love. The effect is the kid never builds what they could have.

@LewisHowes The ones that require you to have actually lived something. You can’t train a model on the specific weight of having been through addiction, loss, or failure and come out the other side. That lived authority is still entirely human.

What jobs will AI never be able to replace?

@ItsKieranDrew Have you always been like that though? When you were starting out dis you make yourself unreachable for half your day? It’s easy to offer that advice when you’re in the position to do it.

A hill I'll die on: You should be unreachable for at least half your day. For example, I recently launched my 1-1 coaching offer. I'm working with five people. I tell them I'm available every day, but only after my writing is done. This protects my creative time, but also lets me invest energy more smartly. Everyone wins. Most people think being always available makes them a better service provider. It doesn't. It makes you a worse writer, a worse thinker, and eventually, a worse coach. Your best work comes from deep focus. And deep focus requires being unavailable. Don't be afraid to draw boundaries. Your clients will respect you for it.

@Jungle__Jay Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to get sick. Let it go. Not for them. For you.

The anger we hold onto.. It only hurts us Forgive. For your own sake

@drewdyck Nothing beats the feeling of getting one of those.

My 7 year old left this on my desk. 🥹

@thought_harbor Every scary thing you pushed through changed the baseline for what scary means. The stuff that used to stop you cold barely slows you down now. That happened because you kept going, not because it got easier on its own.

Courage is like a muscle that gets stronger every time you use it. The first time you do something scary, it is very hard. The second time, it is a little bit easier. By the tenth time, you are not scared at all. Keep pushing yourself to do things that make you feel a little bit nervous so you can grow.

I have a bookshelf that could genuinely solve most of the world’s problems. Atomic Habits. The Power of Now. Four books about stoicism. A journal I’ve used twice. A course on productivity I bought in 2021 that I’ll definitely start on Monday. None of it has done a single thing. Turns out the books don’t implement themselves. Who knew.

All the best self-improvement books, classes and courses won’t work until you do. There is no self-improvement without self-implementation.

@PaulChek Classic line and still true. Most people’s opinions about your life were formed without knowing the half of it. Take what’s useful and leave the rest.

Don't let other people's opinions guide and direct your life. Opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one, and most of them stink.

@RealTalkKim A great comedian makes you forget they wrote that joke a hundred times. A great actor makes you forget they rehearsed that scene for weeks. You make people forget what you’ve been through. That’s a skill.

People assuming you got it easy is really just a compliment to how well you carry yourself.

@WearCoby19733 Forward momentum, even if it feels like a small amount, is still a step towards where you want to be.

The longer you delay, the harder it gets. Start before you feel ready.

@ZoyaBloomz Exactly. And your brain doesn’t always recognize that you’re not taking action. It thinks you’re doing something even when you haven’t taken any action.

@thereframe_ The giveaway is when self-improvement starts working like entertainment. You get relief from recognising yourself in the problem, so the insight starts feeling like movement. But nothing changes because the content is soothing the loop, not interrupting it.

Signs the self-improvement content isn't helping: → You've read the books and nothing's changed → You identify with the problem more than the solution → The insight feels like progress → You're on your fourth life coach

Been close enough to that experience to know it’s real. The way a room changes when a man has nothing to show for himself is brutal and mostly unspoken. The only answer I ever found was to get back to building something. Not to earn their respect back. Just to be able to live with myself.

Unemployment hits differently when you’re a man. Family treats you differently. People lose respect for you. Nobody cares about you and what you say. Family is only nice when you have something to offer. Get up every day and fix your life. The world is very cruel to a poor man.

@Tim_Denning Been there done that. The get-rich-quick market survives because it sells to people in pain who want the pain to end fast.

Going broke because you keep chasing get-rich-quick schemes is extremely painful to witness.

@Kekius_Sage Years in a toxic environment rewires your baseline. You start to think the tension is normal because it’s been constant for so long. Getting out and feeling the difference is how you realise how much it was actually costing you.

Psychologists say leaving a toxic work environment can significantly reduce chronic stress and help the nervous system return to a healthier balance.

🚨 Psychologists say leaving a toxic job can repair your nervous system faster than a year of therapy

@Tim_Denning Delusional optimism is underrated as a strategy. The people who built during previous technological shifts weren’t the most cautious ones. They were the ones who decided the opportunity was real before anyone could prove it. That window is open right now.

The explosion of AI shouldn't be feared. This is the greatest time in history to be a builder. AI amplifies a person's skills. The ones who are screwed are those who don't embrace it. But they won't become homeless. They'll just be forced to change. FAST. This is a good thing. Too many fat cats got email forwarding jobs that added no real value. This inflated their egos. They then started inventing fancy job titles that mean nothing. A mass reset in the egos of all these corporate workers is long overdue. And it's coming. Fear ruins the opportunity. Having delusional optimism enhances it. We're living through a digital renaissance. I've never been more excited. You should be too.

@Lovelistening1 @heavensbvnny That was extremely brave of you Irene. I hope that step helps you to heal.

@thereframe_ @heavensbvnny I had same. Kept silent about child abuse all my life. Today I told a Dr for the 1st time in my life. They can't treat you if they don't know the truth about you. I'm 78.

I’ve noticed that people who grew up walking on eggshells around parents who got angry easily or changed moods without warning often become adults who overthink every word, replay conversations in their heads, and assume they’ve done something wrong, even when nothing actually is. If you can relate, this page is for you.

Growing up without money doesn't teach you to be careful with it. It teaches you to be afraid of it.

@KevinSzabo14 Exactly this. I don’t go to the gym and work out every day because I’m “inspired” or “motivated” either. Some days it’s a struggle just to get in the door. But I do it because I know it’s good for my mind and body and I never regret going.

“I’m not motivated” Guess what? Nobody is bro. No one wakes up And thinks to themselves: “Hell yeah I get to work For 16 hours and get Rejected 1000 times” But winners do it anyway. Because it’s worth it.

@Digitalprospec2 @basedbrickpush1 Different kinds of Aussies go to Bali. Plus, there’s dickheads in every country.

@basedbrickpush1 Go to Bali, you might have a different opinion.

Don't think I've ever met an Australian I didn't like. Super direct. Low threshold for bullshit. Can take a joke. Turns out that the prison island idea is pretty solid.