tyler

6 am text from my brother. Imagine Baggins.

@dukejohncuatro that’s in fact a bad deal

Characters that hate Rocco #WhiteLotus

@charzweber pick up your phone

@dukejohncuatro what if I just prefer “not shitty”

People who have a vodka preference are not cool

okay that’s over. what a wild ride

NOT THE BOOK AT THE END

spending my last moments on twitter by live-streaming my first viewing of Breaking Dawn Part 2 🧵

“Isn’t it wild that this film was approved and greenlit”

THAT CHILD JUST FLEW

Vecna how did you get here

this bitch gay

yoU iMpRiNTed oN mY DAUGHTER

all I want is for Bella to leave these nerds and start a le$bean coven

and now she’s bagged a mountain lion. that’s so peta-friendly

Jacob put your clothes back on

Twilight: Breaking Dawn: Part 2: Softcore Porn