Sam Redlark

Regrettably, my new book 'Boiled Branches, Green Wood - A Book of Trespassers' is not as good as 'Shadow Ticket' but it is interesting, and it covers a lot of ground, and it is available now through Amazon, in paperback or on the kindle. amazon.co.uk/dp/B0FQPRJ5NY

Tulips! Eggs! These are the tertiary components of Easter.

@CletusCrow This sounds like something that a crow would type with its beak.

I'm not actually a crow. I'm just some guy.

I broke my first guitar string. I wish I could say I was doing something exciting but I was just practicing D-chords.

@HBrubanter The man...the machine...Street Hawk.

Yes!

April 1st, 2010: Walking a very long hospital corridor with an Indian phlebotomist, Anna, who is telling every member of staff we encounter 'you've dropped something' then cackling like a madwoman when they stop to look. This went on for 5 minutes. Funniest April Fools ever.

@truhtnac @pourfairelevide I wonder what that charade of helplessness does to a person's mental state long-term. On paper I fall under the Disability Discrimination Act. Clearly I am not disabled. There are days when I am impaired but you don't succumb to it. You find ways around.

@pourfairelevide Aren't significant numbers of Ivy students faking disabilities too? There's a pretty dismal portrait emerging of students who are entirely focused on metrics and winning at any cost, which is no doubt good prep for cut-throat competition in industry, but sad news for culture.

idk man I actually did go to a college where most people willingly did most of the reading and by all accounts still do… the situation is dire but I actually do think this kind of system-gaming is relatively intensified at Ivies in my experience

@JeSuisUnDan Seven is kind of a low body count and the framing is pretentious. If I want keep a running total, I'll stick with the tried and true method of bloody hand-prints on a bare cellar wall.

New clock

For a while I have wondered about the purpose of the ballpoint constellations that one is faced with while lying in an MRI. Now I have an answer.

This is a pitcher plant - a Saracenia leucophylla. Also, on the left, a sundew that came along for the ride and will be getting a pot of its own. The pitcher is underdeveloped on account of it being an exceedingly gloomy March. I am impressed by the height.

I'm in that disquieting window of time that follows an abdominal scan where you don't want the phone to ring. Last time around there was the kind of 'beading' that even drunk girls at Mardi Gras don't want.

@elonmusk It's like part of a cathedral.

Falcon Heavy is so beautiful

@fia Bearman was effectively brake-checked at high speed - not Colapinto's fault - it's the way the cars are now which is your responsibility. This won't the last time it happens this year. There are some circuits where the consequences could be horrifying. Baku is a worry.

Following the accident involving Oliver Bearman at the Japanese Grand Prix and the contribution of high closing speeds in the accident, the FIA would like to provide the following clarifications. #FIA #F1 #JapaneseGP

@mooninabucket I still have a few things from my grandfather, dating to an era when they made things to last and clothing had storied histories.

Almost as old as I am, these ostrich leather boots are so soft, yet so sturdy, with a satisfying weight of untold stories in their heels. Made for a man, they were lovingly maintained and re-soled until, at last, resold—to a woman—in Austin, TX. I hope to be buried in them 💕 👢

@ScribblySpice Disturbing memories of watching this film in childhood prompted me recently to purchase it on DVD. I haven't viewed it yet.

recently watched Picnic at Hanging Rock, heavy into pan flute atm, moving thru this crummy dog-ass world with all the bliss of someone getting a pedicure

@CLASHBooks I have been reading Gravity's Rainbow out loud, which is what I should have done the first time around, as it compels you to engage with the text. It's how I got through Ulysses. Predictably it is taking ages. Afterwards it's on to the wardrobe pile.

I have experienced indie publishing success and still feel dead inside. What’s everyone reading?

Sometimes I have MRI scans done on the unit. Sometimes, as was the case today, it's in an articulated trailer. An unhooked semi-truck with its cab bowed, waiting to tow it away.

@SamJonesGolfer @GREEKMASTER99 It's not racing. It's the illusion of racing. I've been watching since the late 1980s. If this is the way the sport is going then it's not a sport, it's entertainment; a sham.

@GREEKMASTER99 You seem to be forgetting. It’s been some of the best racing we’ve had in a few years. But we all seem to be focusing on the fact they loose some KPH, it really doesn’t mean that much, just picking things to moan about.

Going from 324 to 270kph while at full throttle just isn’t f1. Something needs to be done asap to fix this because it’ll do more harm than good

@valerie_reads @feelsdesperate There are a lot of musical artists whose work I love, who I have briefly followed and then unfollowed on Substack because they are insufferable human beings.

@feelsdesperate Writers.

Worst people on the internet?

@heyThomasTrang I once met a Romanian fisherman named John Constantine (who is also a magician of sketchy morals in the DC/Vertigo universe). I would have mentioned it but he had just got out of jail for punching his captain.

Just found out there’s a girl at my daughter’s school named Alice Cooper and nobody else realises how objectively funny this is.

@F1 Cars are supposed to go faster at full throttle. April Fools day isn't until Wednesday.