im goi

Cant tell if earth quake or stomach ache #!|*¥{‘mw

Asking Goku for guidance during these trying times

Jeff magnum voice: every girl I ever loved didn’t have their drivers license or a car at the time

DARK PSYCH TIP #1 Drive your potential romantic partner to the FaceBook marketplace $20 microwave so they are reminded of you every time they have a hot meal in their home

Twitter just blocked me from tweeting something… really bad Probably for the best

How do I turn off this style of tweets

Told the guy whose hinge said “not political” that my mom died and he said he didn’t really much research on the subject so he doesn’t want to talk about it

That enough tweeting bro ❤️

Candle? If dle tries hard enough!

Looking around my room for objects to tweet about

Sun screen but instead of protecting you from UV rays, the cream is as hot as the sun and instantly incinerates you when you put in on your skin

My TPM is going crazy right now!!!! #TweetsPerMinute

Waking up in the morning and looking at my tweets like you look at a scraped knee

Here’s a tip. Be conservative with your swear usage. I don’t drop S-bombs, but when I do. They go Shitting crazy 🤪

There should be an option for Twitter to filter any tweets that are mean!

Good philosopher: the relative flux of time and being is modulated by perspective Great philosopher: #watdatmean

Thinking about getting into saving memes onto my phone. Any tips for beginners?

The most Latino thing you can do is grill a lot of yummy food in the park with your friends and family

Shoutout to when I woke up at 4:00am and thought somebody assembled a complex angular sculpture in my room but it was just a shadow