MistiDew

That body of yours is absurd

Just got into an elevator with a guy who had farted…badly He looked at me. I looked at him. A moment of mutual acknowledgement. And he just goes “Yeah, sorry.”

the only place i feel true happiness is inside of a Lowes

Fat hack: bite a little piece off each end of a KitKat and you can then use the open ended KitKat as a straw in a glass of milk. As you pull the milk up through the KitKat it soaks the wafer inside so when you go to eat the KitKat it’s all soft and milky.

became friends with someone through a mutual friend / twitter apparently the first time we interacted I called him an idiot meet your mutuals!

Everyone that was born in the 90's is dead

Can someone give Hunter Biden a TV show?

Santa was a mushroom shaman. The Greeks had a secret psychedelic ritual that ran for 2,000 years straight. People in South America were smoking DMT before the wheel was invented. Drug use isn't a modern problem. Prohibition is.

They should add Adderall to the public water supply

For anyone wondering what a mushroom farm looks like

Oh you’re 11 months sober from meth? You want a gold medal? What about all the fucking terror you caused while on meth? Fuck you