Will Laurance

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This Easter I would like my portfolio to rise instead of Jesus

@IRANinZIMBABWE He’s in the hospital apparently

Trump, please talk. We are bored.

The United States has spent EIGHT TRILLION DOLLARS fighting and policing in the Middle East. Thousands of our Great Soldiers have died or been badly wounded. Millions of people have died on the other side. GOING INTO THE MIDDLE EAST IS THE WORST DECISION EVER MADE.....

@AbakpaJob Working on it

can we please start a support group for procrastinators?

@USronaldcarter Big if true.

I just got off the phone with someone who works in defense policy in Washington. What they told me should end every "Trump is reckless" argument permanently. "Every single president since Clinton received the same intelligence briefing on Iran's nuclear timeline. Every single one was told the window was closing. Every single one chose to kick it down the road because the political cost of acting was higher than the political cost of waiting." Trump got the same briefing. 60kg of 90% enriched uranium. 4 weeks to breakout. Material for 2 bombs. He chose to act knowing it would tank his approval to 35%. He chose to act knowing his own base would split. He chose to act knowing NATO allies would refuse to help. He chose to act knowing gas prices would spike. A senior analyst I know at a major think tank put it this way: "The difference between Trump and every president before him isn't intelligence. They all had the same data. The difference is courage." Read that again. Every president had the same file on their desk. Only one opened it and did something. I'll keep you updated. Turn on notifications. 🚨

BREAKING: Pete Hegseth appoints his longtime advisors Jack Daniels and Captain Morgan as his top two generals.

BREAKING: US job growth in February has been revised down from an initially reported -92,000 jobs to a total loss of -133,000 jobs. This marks the biggest monthly US job loss since December 2020.

@unusual_whales Only Linux should go into space

BREAKING: The Artemis II crew encountered Microsoft Outlook issues en route to the Moon and requested help from ground control, per TechRadar

@IRTruePromise Can you confirm if he is being blackmailed by Bibi?

Dear Americans , How does it feel to have a president so detached from reality ?

@MBAeconomics1 They are holding pullbacks much better!

#Silver is down 6%, #Oil is up 14%. Its incredible that silver miners are only down 5%. In recent weeks the oil surges crushed the miners. Things are starting to get interesting! Very exciting!

ANTHROPIC JUST ADMITTED THE ENTIRE CLAUDE CODE LEAK WAS FAKE IT WAS AN APRIL FOOLS PRANK > the "leaked" source code was fabricated > the Mythos model benchmarks were made up > the 3,000 internal documents were planted on purpose anthropic deliberately seeded fake assets in a staging environment they intentionally left unsecured. the npm source map pointed to a completely fabricated codebase 44 fictional feature flags. invented codenames. just enough sloppy details to make it irresistible to post about the tamagotchi pet system. the undercover mode. the engineer named ollie. all fake. they called the project "Capybara" internally because capybaras sit calmly while everything around them escalates they even apologized to cybersecurity researchers at Cambridge and LayerX who spent their entire weekend analyzing documents written on a Thursday afternoon anthropic just pulled off the greatest april fools in tech history. well played

@JamieBonkiewicz Any mispriced @Kalshi bets to place?

I’ll save you some time on the Iran address: • It’s Biden’s fault • 48 hours • Two weeks • Some incoherent gibberish • We’ve won • We are way ahead of schedule • It’s a little excursion • We have obliterated them • We’ve knocked out all their ships • I could open up the Strait of Hormuz • Go get your own oil • They gave us a present • NATO are cowards • Something about Nuclear weapons • Allies are useless • We need allies • Nobody’s ever seen anything like it • Fake news • DEMOCRATS • Obama • More gibberish • I know more than the generals • Greatest foreign policy ever Am I missing anything?

@oriental_ghost Thanks Bai! 谢谢

April 1, 2026, the PM markets data in China. The silver inventory of SHFE has significantly dropped today.

It can be an end to the war, a ground invasion or launching a shitcoin. You just never know

@TheMetalCharts Can we pls not do April fools on metal related content? 😆

🚨 BREAKING 🚨 The Chinese government has banned all silver exports indefinitely and announced that they will pay $150 per ounce on all imports SHFE and SGE silver prices immediately spiked to $150 on the news!

@taylorkenneyitm Unfortunately it’s 100% possible 😂

🚨BREAKING: CME Group eliminates paper silver contracts, moves to 100% physical settlement only.

@RockstarGames Is GTA6 out yet?

Last chance to get a GTA$1,000,000 gift just for playing anytime between now and April 1. Plus, earn 3X Rewards and up to an additional GTA$500,000 in the Community Series this week. Learn more.

@MisterUppy I think you forgot to switch to your other account @MisterSlammy

I sold all of my gold and silver. The bull run is over.

@MindMathMoney @minenergybiz Intern forgot to update the deck

@minenergybiz $4,500 gold in 2026 dropping to $1,500 by 2027. Barrick basically assuming a 67% crash in their own product. Either they know something nobody else does, or these assumptions haven't been updated since the last cycle. Betting on the latter.

Barrick Mining's key outlook assumptions for the gold price in 2027-2028 are fun 🤪 $B

@GrainStats Surprised they don’t have a CDN

USDA didn’t have the planting report on the website until 10 seconds after release but the website was still crashing and not letting anyone get the data because of capacity issues the report was definitely available, but first come first serve - so we will just hit the USDA 1000’s of times per millisecond next time because apparently others are doing it and no one is getting busted for it 🤷