ThePaulGuy

@TAPriceCTR79 You’re full of shit. At least a dozen J6rs are back in jail after being pardoned because they are scumbags, just as an example. Go spread your bigotry elsewhere.

The right's martyrs are law abiding citizens. No criminal records. only 1 was killed while rioting. The left's martyrs have records of repeated felonies and the FEW without such were killed WHILE committing a felony after SEEKING conflict. youtube.com/shorts/UyuLaI0…

@Hossenfeffer @MAGACult2 So many times it has been explained. Tired, blocking you for willful ignorance.

@MAGACult2 no one can ever answer why the files were not released under biden

Iran bombed us the minute we put boots on the ground. They bombed the boats, the base, and god knows how many troops just lost their lives for oil and to cover up the files.

@BonesAndEllie You don’t read it so much as absorb it.

Imma start reading manga

@RepJackKimble I gave it 4 stars on Amazon, gearing up for my ‘insanity’ defense when the draft starts.

Watching The Hot Chick was my Vietnam

@catsareblessing My current cat doesn’t do that much, but when she does I’m in heaven

Cats love their owners too 🥹❤️

@TheVoodooQueen Vet for an enema. Those donations are how I lost my last cat.

🔥🐾 Floofs, Decades long furry ovelord wrangler & nurse. Mystery's bamboozled me, again. 🙄😹 No litter box usage for a few days. I'm straight to impacted poop. Eating a tad less, drinking well, given laxatives, door open 8-4, unbothered. Thoughts?

@sera_kashmar Every couple months I drive five hours to see what’s left of my family, and they get bored of me after about twenty minutes. TBF, nothing ever happens to me.

my paranoia is that it’s somehow apparent that i haven’t actually had any extended face to face conversations with anyone other than my folks in an unnaturally long time but that’s ok too

@highbrow_nobrow * White man exceptions may apply.

Trump Spox Warns U.S. Gun Owners: “Any gun owner knows that when you are carrying a weapon and you are confronted by law enforcement, you are raising the risk of force being used against you.”

@8WithaTiara If I’m going to exert myself picking something up, it’s gonna be my cat.

just picked up a hair tie that had been in the same spot on my bedroom floor for a month. absolutely incredible to see what i'm capable of when i give it my all💪🏼

@JesusChryslerII … and the couch is gooey.

They’re creepy, and they’re kooky…

@ArkyMama Thanks!My first dilute calico! (All my cats have been calico)

Show me something that makes you happy 😊

@atrupar Reporter: ‘Oh, I thought you were saying ‘anal’.’

Leavitt begins the press briefing: "Could you hear our 'amen' in there? We just had a little loud prayer as a team. In this holy week, President Trump and the First Lady are joining in prayer with Christians celebrating the resurrection of our lord and savior, Jesus Christ."

@TotalSeasons Tell us again how you got best down 40 times.

Catturd has got a crumb stuck in his exclamation point key again. That sucks.

@RepLuna Yeah, there isn’t.

New evidence from ODNI confirms what many suspected: intel was manipulated and weaponized to justify baseless attacks against Donald Trump in an effort to delegitimize his presidency before it even began. These lies also resulted in destroying our relationships with nuclear superpower Russia. Well done @CIADirector and @DNIGabbard for shedding light on what is now considered to be the most corrupt scandal in the history of American government.

@s_solis44 @RepLuna @bayerr712 @AGPamBondi Because it didn’t happen?

@RepLuna @bayerr712 Every corrupt scandal and crimes committed by Democrat politicians and officials goes unpunished without any arrests, indictments, prosecutions and prison sentences. Can you ask @AGPamBondi why?

@Mollyploofkins Impressive, but if she’s that flexible she should have stepped through the cuffs to get them in front.

A woman in Muskegon Heights, Michigan has gone viral after she managed to wiggle her way out of a police cruiser window while fully handcuffed and took off running down the street.

@lanechanged I don’t know what I am after my third shot, I just know enough to hide my phone from myself before shot two.

Tequila is nasty as fuck but after a few shots so am i.

@Mr_Husky1 I know this sounds insulting, put have you checked all your pockets? And maybe the lining of your coat? I’ve done that too.

I have lost my keys inside my car. Not locked, LOST. To clarify: My car turned on. My car will only turn on if the keys are inside of it. So they must be in the car. Yet I cannot find my keys. My car is not messy. There is very little in it. I’ve looked everywhere. And yet, the keys are nowhere to be found. But they have to be here. Hence, I have lost my keys in my car. What … and I cannot stress this enough … the f*ck?

@tdterrilldee @Mr_Husky1 I’ve done that. I put an AirTag on my keys afterward.

@Mr_Husky1 Did you put something in your trunk first or get something out of the trunk? Sometimes you’ve got your keys in your hand and you put some blankets in the trunk and you let go of the blankets AND the keys and you shut the trunk lid! Pop your trunk and check for your key in there.

@flossiegirl72 @EastEndJoe Borowitzreport. Satire.

@EastEndJoe @xinfinity Not even a little bit true.

Fuck! This is bad news!