Chunk Pierce

@bryan_johnson Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re just an 18-year old kid, biologically.

Guys, I’m an idiot. All this time I’ve spent trying not to die, I had toxic turf in my backyard. Artificial turf contains crumb rubber infill made from recycled tires, which leaches chemicals including PFAS, heavy metals, and polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons. These compounds are linked to hormone disruption, carcinogenicity, and systemic inflammation. I don’t know how I missed it. It makes me question my basic competence in life. What gets me is that I try so hard to survey the world of potential idiocy. Then I find out there’s a monument to idiocy sitting right in front of my face that I was blind to. I’m removing the turf, yet I’m still stuck with this seemingly unsolvable problem of how to not be an idiot.

@TheDailyDraught Crown Black

What's the most recent whiskey you've bought? 👇

@JohnnyLCKai 😂

Castaway is really a movie about a guy who starts out being obsessed with packages and ends up loving balls.

@monkeyincrisis Gay point five

Rate my pose.

@MasonW4636344 @PhillyRepub90 @3YearLetterman Sorry.

@ChunkPierce @PhillyRepub90 @3YearLetterman Chuck, that’s not a good thing

I just had a very disturbing Good Friday encounter with an ICE agent at the airport As I was going through security, an ICE agent asked me for my ID. I told him this isn’t Soviet Russia and that the only citizenship papers I planned to show him were the Declaration of Independence “Sir, I’m just asking for ID, not proof of citizenship,” he said. “Today is the anniversary of Jesus’s resurrection,” I replied. “He was an American. Would you have asked to see his papers too? Would the scars on his hands not have been enough for you?” He was stunned silent. I strode past him without showing my ID and went through the metal detector I received a standing ovation

@ActualBraun @3YearLetterman Good. Keep your limp noodle away from her then.

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman Neither does your mom

@dan_raga @3YearLetterman If I want your opinion I’ll beat it out of you.

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman Keep your weird sniffing fetishes to yourself. Thank you very much.

@cwiktrippack @3YearLetterman Don’t get your hopes up, gay boy.

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman Chuck, you look like you smell like a Europoor.

@Fakenam09161309 @3YearLetterman Says the twit hiding behind a fake name.

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman Chick, quite the word salad to say you never lettered in shit.

@PhillyRepub90 @3YearLetterman Pretty easily, yes. Not as easy as your mom, but yes.

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman You just announced to the world you turn door knobs with ease

@LoneOakRepublic @3YearLetterman Nice try “doctor.”

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman Neither does your chunky ass🤷‍♂️

@Trudat420 @3YearLetterman Watch it or I’ll show up at your night job and slap the dick outta your mouth.

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman All you are sniffing is your own pussy

@mattvanswol Don’t sweat petty things and don’t pet sweaty things.

Working on a project. Parents, what is the best parenting advice you can give about raising kids?

@elonmusk Bill Gates told me this can’t be real. 😂

Tesla Semi is so clean, cool & fun!

@JohnnyLCKai Yes Sensei!

Sensei lesson of the day. Never get vegetables on a pizza..ever

@KlockoFett @3YearLetterman Next you’ll probably try to tell me he’s a notary public.

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman Chork, never doubt a story told by Coach. He's got a full set of gently used encyclopedias and a vintage globe, so hes never been wrong before.

@_Bu7ch @3YearLetterman

@ChunkPierce @3YearLetterman sniff again, charles

@mattvanswol @AP C’mon, the turtle isn’t THAT old.

@AP Is that Mitch McConnell?

Jonathan, believed to be 193 and the world’s oldest known tortoise, is still alive on St. Helena despite rumors of his death. Officials dismissed the reports as a hoax, saying he is “very much alive.”

@RealJamesWoods @RealDeanCain Unreal. I’m sorry for you and everyone who lives or lived there.

This is what they’ve been up to all along. They did everything but strike the match.