Ersatz

I’m schizophrenic and my IQ is 147

Extremely difficult to take Twitter personalities, put them into an environment which is not Twitter and expect them to survive. Whenever I put you lot into a picaresque novel you all just die.

@lampadafilii Beautiful

@TheCornCobbler I haven’t given much thought on if it’s okay or not yet. But I’ll trust you.

@apocryphalite Some men are Corn and that's okay. Its perfectly normal to be Corn, actually.

To be female is to follow a linear biological path; to grow female, to be born from a female and to live as a female. To be male is to mutate from female to male at eight weeks, to be born through a woman and then to establish oneself as a non-female. All men are trans men.

@penisilinne @Neoskiiiii My ass thought that was the strait of hermuz

@Neoskiiiii delete this

AYO I WANT A REFUND TF

@czlowiek_burger @Just_Strange_ Hahahaha, that’s a really distinct comparison. I like it. And yes, I hope we’ve all learned some lessons from the insecure man.

@apocryphalite @Just_Strange_ you sometimes sound like a hybrid of Schopenhauer's mom and a Jane Austen protagonist (compliment) also I love that this sort of nigga exists because I can look at them and say at least I'm not them

I once collapsed drunk in front of the Virgin of Pilar in Zaragoza and prayed for an hour. Awful hangover the next morning.

I can listen to Americans speak for five minutes at a time. Make use of your time.

Disturbed by the presence of Americans; they have the television voice, and they never stop using it. It is like talking to a puppet. I do not consider them human.

@Just_Strange_ Whatever helps you cope, Stranger

@apocryphalite The mask takes over its host.

I regret that I will have to begin with a reproach, but here we find ourselves. I will correct you on a number of points which came about in your video. Despite the rather ugly portrait which you have painted of me, as a gnashing, imperious woman who thinks herself above you, you should know that I have always considered us equals, which is perhaps the thing you find most difficult to forgive. That I took such care in our acquaintance, that I so seldom replied, you may have considered a compliment, and not an insult, as you have unfortunately chosen to. Perhaps, perhaps, it may have been so. Do you remember what Lacan said about the husband who, without proof, nevertheless suspected his wife of infidelity? I will remind you. He said that the wife did in fact cuckold him, and without leaving a trace of evidence which would arouse suspicion. That is to say, that despite the infidelity, the husband's jealousy continued to be a pathological trait. You tell me you do not care what I think of you. And yet here is the video. Let's leave things there. Now: I fear that the performance you gave, in which you explicitly mention how interesting and insightful your replies are, and vaguely allude to the great service you have done me by encouraging my writing, is in danger of making you ridiculous should you extrapolate upon it further. Let me explain. We should remain aware that whatever we put out into the world now will reflect upon us in the years to come, and that no grievance is ever as dignified as the person who declines to record it. The person who grovels, who lists the painted toenails he would have kissed, who says please don't block me, is not a person making a point. He is a person revealing one. I mean to say that some sort of inversion is taking place. In short: be careful. I direct this to you, but I am engaged in a private exercise. A meditation, for which your video is the occasion and not the subject.

@Bulkington___ I’ll ask them if they allow paedophiles

@apocryphalite Can you sneak me into them also

Add me to your groupchats

Do you have to reply to every single post you see? I was willing to keep you a mutual on this account to give you the benefit of the doubt, to see if you’d figure out why I removed you from my private but clearly you have not. I’m going to tell you this because no one else will but the excessive replies are annoying. Especially when they’re not really funny. The reason Em and I and I’m sure countless others have removed you from their accounts is because of this.

@apocryphalite Maybe you prayed for the hangover

@Piryme This makes sense to me

@apocryphalite Empathchan gave AIDS to the monkey who gave AIDS to patient 0

If you’re stupid enough to have sex with Empathchan then maybe you deserve the monkey AIDS

@mythomatician Yes, AIDS is no joke.

@apocryphalite “It actually happened?”

@decay_our Banger this one

it’s so fun to be a young, trendy english major. it feels like if you don’t buy some sort of expensive art and wear one of those crazy unisex dress shirts they’re going to call you an “artsy farts.”

@polygonsqueeze Horrible

@apocryphalite I remember infiltrating Scottish Twitter several years back & it had me saying “get tae fuck” for like 2 months straight

One of the funniest things that Scottish people do is pretend that "Scots" is a unique language which developed independently of English. Incredible levels of delusion. Just admit that you can only spell phonetically.