Luigi Vercotti

@EricIdle Now that's a Norwegian Blue!

Funny interview with a man from Norway

@AmbJapanUK Solar not included - you have to provide your own sun. 🌞

Amasing 🇯🇵🇬🇧partnership!!😄 👇👇👇

@JonTrevithick Tattooed on the back of the neck.

@SRoadk2 How can you tell...

It's the Archbishop!

@UK_Needs_Reform Balls Up

Migrants Up Immigrants UP

WELL DONE @UKLabour Have I missed anything? Taxes UP Petrol UP Diesel UP Heating oil UP LPG gas UP House gas UP Electricity UP Water UP TV license UP Road Tax UP Food Bills. UP Mortgage. UP Building Materials UP Government Speeding UP Rent UP MPs wages. UP Hospital waiting lists. UP Pot holes on roads. UP Shop lifting. UP Crime. UP Everything UP

@CraigHughes123 @bushontheradio Send them a Christmas card.

@bushontheradio Bugger all 😁

What do you still do for your kids despite them being grown up?

@rewindtvuk Jekyll and Hyde.

@JuliaBradbury It's the same with people who say "what would you do If you were me?" Answer - I'd make my own mind up.

Ever had one of those days when someone you don't want advice from says ' if I were you..' But you're not. Thank you. 😂 #lifeadvice

@EmoPhilips They give me the same look when I ask for sex on the beach.

Dear Flight Attendants, If you don’t have eggnog, just say so; there’s no need to give me that look

@CraigHughes123 @BulldogBDX @NECRestoShow "There he is, heading for the bar again"

Caption, what is @BulldogBDX saying? @NECRestoShow

@CuriosityonX Stupid boy.

The invisible Glass experiment Scientists once placed a transparent glass barrier inside an aquarium. On one side was a fierce pike, and on the other side were several smaller fish swimming freely. When the hungry pike saw the smaller fish, it immediately rushed forward to attack. Bang. It slammed straight into the glass and bounced back. Confused, the pike kept trying again and again, but every attempt ended the same way. The repeated collisions injured its head and knocked off some of its scales. Eventually, the pike became frightened and retreated to a corner of the tank. After some time, the scientists quietly removed the glass barrier. The smaller fish now swam freely throughout the aquarium, even brushing against the pike’s mouth. But the pike never tried to eat them again. Even though it was hungry, it refused to attack. In its mind, the invisible wall was still there. A few days later, the pike reportedly died of starvation, surrounded by food. This phenomenon is often referred to as the Pike Effect or Pike Syndrome. It’s often used as a metaphor for how repeated failure can create invisible limits in the mind.

@EmoPhilips 4 years on and the mystery is still unsolved.

I don’t know who needs to see this

@MrJamesMay Do you live in a windmill?

A mouse got into our kitchen. I have murdered it. My inner Buddhist is appalled.

@CraigHughes123 @NECRestoShow @classiccarguru1 Are you Marty McFly or Doc? 👦-👴

Do you think it suits me? Asking for a friend (I mean the wife) @NECRestoShow @classiccarguru1

@EmoPhilips "A Porsche! a Porsche! my kingdom for a Porsche!" Richard 911

now is the vernal equinox of our discontent

@MarkHaydock5 That's because it's got lots of posts.

Blimey, this fence gets around a bit 🙄😆😆

@CuriosityonX King penguin.

@EricIdle That would be Spamalone.

I’m supposed to be coming for a book signing in October. Maybe I’ll just do a One Man Spamalot.

@EmoPhilips Hold on ............. there's going to be a recount.

@_daveharrison Dear David. Your UK allies would love to help, but we've only got one boat which is presently rowing to Cyprus. The people who live on the Isle of Wight are pretty livid about losing their ferry to the mainland I can tell you. If we get another boat you can have first go. Cheers

Dear U.S. Allies, We don't need or want your help. This is our war. @POTUS Dotard is our Supreme Leader. He will get us out of the mess he got us into. Or maybe he won't. He probably won't. Thank you for your attention to this matter. Your friend, David R. Harrison