School of Science

@fesshole You're a prick of a dad

My partners son lives alternate weeks between his mum and dad. He is such a lazy disgusting twenty something. When he is with us, I purposely piss over the toilet seat and make a mess so it looks like he did it. 2 years in and it is working perfectly. Partner wants him gone.

@JamesLucasIT Telly got better

Why did humans stop building wonders?

@anon_opin Top cat , why don't you , wacky races

There hasn't been a better run of three consecutive shows on any TV channel or network in the world since the classic Baywatch, Gladiators and Blind Date run on 90s ITV Saturday nights. Prove me wrong.

@anon_opin Ahhh , the 'Golden years '

@RickyGroverUK Pizza hut , all you can eat , £4.99 , not bad is it

I've tried to play the game with the chia seeds and guided meditations but I haven't been to the khazi for two weeks and I feel more wound up than ever! Time to smash the granny outta the punch bag and put a crafty jar of Nutella to bed! Av a lovely stress free day you Rascals!

@NicolaAdamsOBE You used to be a bloke. Like Hayley

@TRobinsonNewEra What a fucking gimp

Tomorrow is the day. We retake London, a sea of patriots are coming. We've had a week of Muslims and roma gypsies showing us the worst of Britain. Tomorrow we showcase the best of Britain 🇬🇧 See you all there.

@RadioGenoa Their parents must be proud....

“Allah, Allah, who f*ck is Allah”, shout British patriots in London. Also little patriots join in cry.

@reid6peter Absolute legends but you don't half look like a couple of ageing gays in benidorm

🍾💙

@GreenJennyJones @JustStop_Oil Good . Fucking idiots

Astonishingly severe sentencing by Judge Hehir on the case against the @JustStop_Oil campaigners. Five years for one, four years each for the four others. What happened to free speech? They were trying to protect our planet. They are not violent. They are despairing.

@fesshole I bet your wife is cheating on you

Wife and 2 kids always eat the chocolate side of the Neapolitan ice cream before the banana and strawberry. So now I cut half of the chocolate side out and store it in our second freezer in the garage, which has a padlock.

@LFCGroove Bet you cried when he snapped vvd . Victim

I wasn’t even that arsed who won tonight tbh but seeing that T rex armed cunt in tears is fucking incredible 😂

@joshpearson180 This weirdo needs his hard drive checked

Fuck right off 😭😭😭😭

@mikeparry8 If this is the best you've ever tasted, you eat shit food

Long old week of politics/football .. Now it's Friday so it's gotta be Fish and Chips at Spoons. Look at that lemon wedge .. You don't get that in your fancy restaurants .. The fish is the best I've ever tasted: The meal cost £10.08 .. Why would you ever go anywhere else 😁👍🦈🍺

@JWJB_CAFC What a fucking sausage

@PhilipDilley @McCannCaseTweet What would he call an actual Rolex then ?

@McCannCaseTweet No. When these people say 'a Rolex' it's crimmo code for a packet of drugs.

ANONYMOUS interview with family member of Tenerife worker close to Lucy I will be posting clips in this thread… over next 24 hours 📌Jay stole a watch from a very drunk man… who turned out to be a very big deal on the island 📌#JaySlater is alive and on the run

@TrenamanMartin Man say him a ting , him a ting

Could this be true?

@anon_opin Sorry you got hurt

Anyone that bids on anything on eBay before the last one or two seconds is an absolute idiot.

@TRobinsonNewEra I have just left that game ..that wasnt after the second goal went in . Very little trouble there tonight

Turks started attacking Dutch fans as the second goal went in, two goals in 5mins send turkey out the tournament.

@newmanstings @Cex @DavidBrentMovie @RedDwarfHQ @Pug_fans_

Me & my brother (42) have started a new game every Sat morning where we go into a CEX & rack up points by finding DVD’s that I’m in! 1pt - association 2pt - in it (but wrong series) 5pt - in it 10pt - name or pic on sleeve +10pts BD (This haul’s worth 40pts!) Happy B’day Mum!