When you’re drinking at home and you put your sink next to water and go back to pick your drink up hit grab the water... it’s God telling you to chill out. #drinkingmom
Trying to vacuum but my toddler ran after me saying (no yelling) NONONO. He took the vacuum and turned it off. Apparently I was inhibiting his TV time. #momlife#parenting#toddler
It’s not even 9 AM and we been outside for 30 minutes. What happened to weekend cartoons
Keeps telling oneself, “you’re a good mama.”
#momlife#momminghard#parenting
Husband: did you give that kid cocaine or something?!
Me: No
Toddler: NO ... Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!! *proceeds to run around the living room like a nut job* #parenting
It’s bitter-sweet when your toddler won’t nap on a Saturday. Sweet bc you get more time. Bitter bc you know the pill that will arise later. #toddlerlife#momlife#parenting
Thank you @Walmart for subbing my Great Value pizza for @DiGiorno now I don’t have to order delivery bc its not delivery, it’s Digiorno. and yes I was going to buy frozen pizza AND order @PapaJohns or @dominos
My back hurts. My head hurts. My contacts are drying out. I’m tired. But I’m a mom. Sip that #crownandcoke and say. “Yes buddy. I see the truck.” #momlife#parenting
My car has a mind of its own. I tried to tell it all the errands I needed to run before going to pick up my toddler, yet it took me to daycare. Now I feel guilty driving by. #workingmom