Pinned Tweet
With the news that cocaine was found at Chevening, the inspiration for Truss and Kwarteng’s Mini-Budget makes a lot more sense now.
English
Mrs Nigel Farage
9.7K posts
Mrs Nigel Farage
@MrsNigel
Wife of The Right Hon Mr Nigel Farage (tbc) and First Lady of Brexit. Parody obvs.
Brexit-on-Sea Joined Nisan 2019
9.3K Following21.4K Followers
Jenrick vs Badenoch is like having to choose between Salmonella and Listeria. Both are deeply unpleasant but one is more dangerous if you are pregnant.
English
@MrsNigel As somebod who studied food microbiology , this made be laugh out loud and made my day
English
Fair play to Liz Truss. If you can’t beat the lettuce you can dress like one.
English
Nigel is thinking of renaming Reform Ltd as the Party of Pointlessly Angry People. After all, he’s not going to be reforming anything any time soon. What do you think?
English
On the bright side, I’m sure Gareth Southgate would have voted for Brexit.
English
Nigel says he’s expecting to go to hell and back today. It’s funny, I thought he was going to Clacton.
English
After last night’s debate, I do feel rather sorry for young Rishi Sunak. I might vote Conservative so they get at least one vote in Brexit-on-Sea. Don’t tell Nigel.
English
Gosh! Michelle Mone has just sailed into Brexit-on-Sea in her yacht. The funny thing is, as soon as the crew had finished attaching the moorings they jumped off and ran up the beach into the car park where a white van was waiting.
English
Nigel’s buying a plane! I can’t decide if that’s good news or bad.
English
Hmm. Nigel seems to have developed some expensive tastes recently.
English
@WilliamKan15216 I wouldn’t know. That ship sailed a long time ago my dear.
English
@MrsNigel You must be a happy woman being married to the biggest knob in the UK.
English
Oh dear, it seems that the Reform Party Ltd was actually my idea. Soz everyone.
Mrs Nigel Farage@MrsNigel
Nigel has announced that when we leave the EU, the Brexit Party Ltd will be liquidated and a new company, the Reform Party Ltd, incorporated. Regional Franchisees can re-apply for new packages at the same rate, but any purchases made from the company shop cannot be refunded.
English
In an effort to emulate his ‘friend’ Donald Trump’s status as a convicted felon Nigel is trying to get himself arrested. He has stolen Ann’s smalls (if you can call them that) from her washing line and is currently hitting the fruitie in the Police Horse & Baton with a hammer.
English
Poor Nigel, he’s trying really hard but Donald never replies.
Nigel Farage MP@Nigel_Farage
Happy birthday to my friend Donald Trump.
English
Of course Scotland are going to win against Germany tonight, they are the wurst team in the tournament, Nigel says.
English
Gosh, Ed Davey has just turned up in Brexit-on-Sea asking if he can be fired out of our cannon. He’s very welcome, but Ann won’t be happy if he lands in her thatch as he’ll make a considerably bigger hole than dear Mark Francois used to do.
English