Waiting between worlds

a summary youtube.com/playlist?list=…

I wish i died when i was little

@verydrearydays It's not the breaking down that makes BPD insufferable, it's the BPD abandoning you and not ever taking responsibility for any betrayal they commit.

i have bpd it took me years to unlearn self-destructive behavior nobody ever wanted to be near me back then cause i was insufferable and would break down all the time. you really, really don't want to deal with that! take it from someone who used to be an obsessed freak

@callanable @itinerantfog I'm not saying to say it will get worse, rather more of a "the only way it *can* get better is with time, but be prepared it might not"

@TalchionDalias @itinerantfog I hear you, but if everyone was down on me saying things wouldn't improve, I probably wouldn't have actually made it. and things got worse and worse and worse literally every month to the point of absurdity!

broke up with my ex, gf my dad died, moved back home, 2 of my 3 dogs died, the last ones going deaf, my mom had to sell our family house that I grew up in and is moving out of my hometown, during this time I’ve are my shadow and let go of the past, the universe forced a reset

@callanable @itinerantfog I understand why people do this but I don't think it's a good thing to promise possibly false hope... Things can get better, doesn't mean they will, it is very possible to have bad endings

@itinerantfog hi! so, this is relatable. I'm sorry you're going through it, but it won't last forever and there will be good things on the other side. x.com/callanable/sta…

so does anyone else occassionally get a random 2 seconds of perfect clarity where you fully realise and feel just how far downhill your life has gone and the fact that it's 2026 and not 2021 but then your brain immediately shuts down and corrects itself back to normal

私は自殺ってある意味寿命だと思ってるんだよね。たまに「生きたくても生きられなかった人もいるのに」と自殺した人を責める人がいるけど、自ら死を選んだ人は心が寿命を迎えてしまったんだよ。身体だけが健康だからって人間は生きれる訳では無いから

I want to believe in the supernatural in some form. Physical closure feels boring. I want the portal to open, the angels to descend, etc. But I absolutely refuse to be lulled into believing in something fake just because I want to, and so far no such claims are convincing.

This isn't life, this isn't even just existing, it's stretching out what is already impossibly thin as to be transparent. There is no point in dragging myself to and from bed with no desire to do anything just to feel this pain all the time. I very much need it to be over.

Given that I'll soon finally have the means to do so, I really do think this will be the last year of my life. I'm not really that sad about it anymore. Just empty. It feels like there isn't even breath in my lungs anymore, everything has a dark tinge to it and I'm suffocating.

@JJ_McCullough As if there's any chance Trump thinks of Charles III as King of Canada and not the King of the UK

It's so stupid that this is being treated as a serious news story in all the big Canadian papers when the anecdote of the "royal biographer" himself doesn't actually say anything that proves this!

Trump says if Iran doesn't make a deal to reopen the Strait of Hormuz by tomorrow night, he will bomb them in all sorts of unprecedentedly horrific ways. What will happen tomorrow?

“you look tired is everything ok” i have been dragging my corpse of a body around for years i barely feel like a person everything feels like a chore basic tasks seem like crossing mountains & oceans & at this point it just seems like im waiting to die

Some die of thirst and some drown

@birdchad88 So acceptable a whole country named themselves after it

It goes without saying that hard R is off the table but… Soft G?

@lapislagoons Because it's like empty calories. Food that doesn't make you feel full. We weren't built to sustain ourselves off of digital validation, but rather physical affection.

when I’m feeling like a waste of space and a bunch of strangers say I’m not, it actually makes me feel worse

@realtimeai @callanable It doesn't really have anything to do with mindset here. I've dated a few times with limited success. The options for men like me are just few and far between. Girls like OP will give decent guys chances when they meet but girls like OP are exceedingly rare.

@TalchionDalias @callanable This is a great counterexample. If you manage to change that mindset, your dating pool will improve beyond what it ever was while you had that mindset.

this is good advice for well-adjusted people, but well-adjusted people don’t need this advice. some of us—like me!—had a lot to (un)learn in our 20s and even 30s. the “optimal” path is not available to all, and reacting from a scarcity mindset can lead to disastrous outcomes.

@Johnhenry2244 @callanable Girls have universally confirmed with me they prefer a partner count of 3-7 for their bfs, lower than 3 = other women didn't want him, red flag, over 7 = he uses women for sex, red flag.

@TalchionDalias @callanable Fact it is over 30 never got even close to a talking stage foids dont want guys at this late age with no experience im just waiting for the end lol

I hate myself, I'm so replaceable, so unstable, nothing is special about me. no one is coming to save me, I can't even save myself.