Brian Wise

A wise man once said, "Fuck this shit," and lived happily ever after.

@Kinza1278 Clara

@BamaSaltyMarine Spot on!

We stopped disciplining children and started diagnosing them. Now we have a society full of adults who think everything is someone else's fault. Tell me I'm wrong!

@GuntherEagleman Myself,.,...

Choose carefully… and be ready to defend it in the comments. This ought to be interesting. I’m really sorry I’m making y’all choose. 😂

@BamaSaltyMarine Good job trying to make friends.

I had a Muslim immigrant over last night! We took a tour of our little house! When we walked into the bathroom he looked around. Stopped and asked, what is that thing with water in it! I told him, it’s a watering hole! He dropped to his knees and took a drink! Got up and said, the water is a little….Salty! I then showed him how to refill it, by flushing it! Then, I started cooking some bacon and he immediately left! Oh well, you can’t please them with everything!

@Avabelly__ You do know that a sign like that will only make people more curious as to what you might be hiding, dont you?

I put a sign in my front yard asking people not to look at my house as they walk by. Some people think it's ridiculous, but I see my home as a private space, not something for strangers to casually observe. Maybe I'm overthinking it, but privacy matters to me. Be honest... would you find this sign reasonable or completely absurd?

@MahikRani50377 His wife has been shopping for 3 hours inside the store. Hes just waiting for the money to run out

So I was at Walmart today and noticed something that honestly felt really strange to me 😕🚘There was a guy completely slumped over asleep in his car parked in one of the front-row spots near the entrance. No movement, no bags, no sign he was shopping… just fully knocked out sitting there while the lot was getting more and more crowded.Meanwhile people were circling around struggling to find parking just to run inside and buy groceries.After a while I ended up letting a couple employees know because I genuinely didn’t know if they were even aware of it. Part of me wondered if the guy was okay, but another part of me was also thinking… are busy retail parking spots really supposed to turn into long-term resting areas while actual customers can’t find space? 😭And before people jump in with:“maybe he was tired!”Okay… sure. But where’s the line then?Because it feels like parking lots are meant for active customers, not someone essentially camping out in one of the best spots for an extended period while everyone else drives in circles trying to shop.The more I thought about it, the more confusing it felt. Stores have policies for everything else, but situations like this somehow become awkward where nobody wants to say anything because they’re afraid of looking insensitive. At some point shouldn’t there be some kind of check-in or policy for this stuff? 🤔

@beckstwits @mcgmouton57 So your saying that because you mistakenly think I did something wrong, its fine that you can do something that is twice as destructive. That is the mindset of a 4 year old. Grow up asshole!

@mcgmouton57 How demented were the Trump MAGAts storming the capital?

I don't understand if this keeps happening how cameras and personal are not on scene to catch the perpetrators. It's the National Mall for Christ's sake! Vandals once again have sabotaged a Freedom 250 event to be held on the National Mall. This time they cut generators fuel lines that powers temporary lights causing the fuel to leak into underground water tanks contaminating them. Cleanup crews were immediatly dispatched and remediated the site. Last week an individual cut a fuel line leading to a light tower as well. How demented do people have to be to sabotage the celebration of the 250th anniversary of the founding of OUR nation. 🇺🇸 nypost.com/2026/06/02/us-…

@Murk441 Have you ever watched the show on the History channel "Ancient Aliens "? Kinda reminds me of that.

Whats the 1st thing that comes to mind

@saniyafatma1278 Are you absolutely sure your real name isn't Karen? Who gives a flying f☆ck?

Am I the only one who thinks it’s inconsiderate to let your kid draw with chalk all over a public playground? Especially in an area where rain doesn’t really reach, so it’s just sitting there for everyone else to deal with. We brought our kids to the park to play — not to leave with chalk all over their clothes, hands, shoes, and everything else. And I’m not even blaming the kids. Kids are kids. Of course they’re going to draw wherever they’re allowed to. But that’s exactly why parents should be paying attention. There’s a big difference between sidewalk chalk on an actual sidewalk and covering playground equipment or shaded areas where it doesn’t wash away easily. Public spaces are shared spaces. I just feel like if your kid is going to make a mess somewhere everyone uses, the parent should either clean it up or redirect them. Am I being too picky, or is this actually inconsiderate?

@TheHost_ Maybe, a simple " Excuse me " would have worked?

It finally happened. I’m at Kroger and this woman saw me walking, walked in from of me, and STOPPED with her cart positioned in the middle of the aisle in such a way I would have to move and squeeze to get through. I looked at her in disbelief. Paused for a minute. And shoved her cart out of the way. Without a word, passed “Go!”

@otokyo Water seeks its own level, maybe your the problem

@PATRIOT2117 Only in America........

I was heading upstairs to bed on a Tuesday night when I happened to glance out the back window and noticed that the light in my garden shed was on. I was fairly certain I hadn't left it on. I was positive I could make out two thugs moving around in there, going through shelves that contained tools belonging to me and not to them. I went to the phone and called the local police. A recorded message directed me to press several different numbers before I reached a human being, who explained that all units were currently engaged and that someone would be dispatched as soon as one became available. It might be a while. I thanked him and hung up. I sat in my armchair and looked at the phone for about sixty seconds. Then I picked it up again and called the same number. When the operator answered, I said calmly, “Hello. I called a few minutes ago about the two burglars going through my garden shed. You don't need to rush anymore — I've just shot them both.” I hung up. In the time it takes to brew a decent pot of coffee — roughly four minutes — two police cars came flying down my street, a helicopter appeared overhead with a searchlight, and a very committed response team came through my back garden gate. They found the two burglars still in the shed, entirely unshot, frozen in place. An officer came over to me looking somewhat bemused. “Ma’am,” he said, “you told the dispatcher you'd shot them.” “Yes,” I said. “And your dispatcher told me no one was available.”

@snowyxq1 Absolutely NO! Its clear they dont respect my freedom of choice

BE HONEST IF A MUSLIM FAMILY SITTING NEXT TO YOU AT A RESTAURANT ASKED YOU NOT TO EAT BACON IN FRONT OF THEM. WOULD YOU RESPECT A MUSLIM FAMILY? YES OR NO

@OGsDontFold Buy him a new pair of shoes and tell him to Hoof it.

how would you discipline a 19-year-old son who racked up 20 speeding camera tickets in one month? $40 each, so that’s $800 gone. Kid’s got my car flying like it’s a damn racetrack. Taking the keys away permanently? Making him pay every cent back? Or something harsher? Need real advice, not soft parenting nonsense.

@SBilke10323 @Sassafrass_84 I suggest you do a serious deep dive into what actually happened instead of listening to mainstream media soundbites.

@Sassafrass_84 Having the doj investigate the women he raped, getting 1.8 billion to fund the terrorists that attacked the capitol in January 6th, killing us citizens because they protest his policies, ignoring the Epstein release law, pardoning the highest bidder. That destroys democracy

I’m tired of hearing that Trump is "destroying democracy." He has no interest in ending our constitutional republic. You can dislike his brash style, bragging, and language. That's fine. None of that threatens the system. A republic falls when voters repeatedly elect socialists promising "free stuff," slowly converting it into a big-government machine that trades your rights and freedoms for dependency. Step off the Trump hate train. The real threat isn’t Trump’s personality. It’s the march toward communism. Read a book liberals.

@jackknopf4024 @Avabelly__ Your not just paying for the labor of doing the job, your paying for the expertise of a skilled professional who is no doubt running his own business

Yep, it looks pretty easy. You’d better get started. Don’t make any mistakes or you’ll do it over and over and over and over again and it will look much worse than it does right now. Maybe you should realize that you’re not just buying the labor for the job, but also the experience and skills of the handyman to do a fast and simple job. As long as he does it correctly and does an excellent job on it, I don’t care if it takes him six hours or 90 minutes. PAY HIM! You’re probably not gonna find a woman to do it.

I'm losing my mind. I called a handyman to fix this one small hole. He had the nerve to quote me $600! For what?! A $20 patch kit from Home Depot? He's trying to tell me he has to 'cut a new square,' 're-tape the seams,' and 'paint the entire wall' to blend it. What a joke! Does he really think I'm that dumb?! He's just trying to scam me into paying for a full day's work for a 30-minute job.

@Monica55dzrh A fence is traditionally installed with the "pretty" (finished) side facing out towards neighbors, the street, or public areas. The structural side (posts and rails) faces inward toward your property

Read this, be proud of it, dont let them Demoncrats ruin your celebration! The unwinnable war America's Founding Fathers fought and won changed human history forever foxnews.com/opinion/unwinn…

@BamaSaltyMarine I feel your pain!🤣🤣🤣

"Dude... who the hell farted?" a guy asked while standing in the Walmart checkout line. Nobody answered. Then suddenly...the smell spread across aisle 4 like a chemical attack. One woman dropped her shopping basket and screamed, IT BURNS MY EYES! A veteran-looking guy instantly dove behind the candy shelf yelling, "GET DOWN! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!" Within seconds... people were crawling on the floor. A cashier pressed the emergency button, two moms started praying, and one old lady texted her family: "I love you all." Meanwhile... an old grandpa slowly pushed his cart forward and whispered, "Damn... my medication finally working."

@CynicalPublius Do you remember the radioactive Fiestaware? LOL

In 1976 this was a fancy dinner.

Anyone who claims the lack of joy about the 250th is a function of a rough economy was not alive in 1976. The country rocked in its 200th celebration and the economy was a FREAKING MESS. There is this Gen Z misconception that the '70s and early '80s were some sort of economic golden age of readily available, well-paying jobs, low cost housing and an all around sense of prosperity. WRONG. Google "Stagflation." Google "gas lines." Google "mortgage interest rates in the 1980s." Our economy today is a golden age by comparison, without exaggeration. Yet somehow in 1976 we could gleefully celebrate our nation's birthday without Democrats turning it into a Howard Zinn-inspired anti-history hatefest.