Classified Goat™️ (Parody Goat)

A damn flipflopper no less

He was real gangster.

So Thomas Massie had a livestream last night with 650 people on it and wound up raising over $300k? That seems suspicious... Is there dark money funding the Massie campaign? JUST ASKING QUESTIONS!

Karen gets mad that a property that doesn’t belong to her is getting cleaned: 🤨

@ClankProps @Vol_Hoops

@Classified_Goat @Vol_Hoops I agree!

after twenty

North Carolina children get to watch a mom and a school employee beat the living crap out of each other. Great education!

Liberal woman says she wants to be activated as one of the terrorist "sleeper cells." Cc @FBI

Chuck Norris didn't join the Marine Corps...the Marine Corps applied to him. Heaven’s streets have always been guarded by Marines. Today, Chuck Norris reported for duty. We mourn the passing of Chuck Norris, a @usairforce veteran, who also became an honorary Marine in 2007 when awarded the title by then Commandant of the Marine Corps, Gen. James T. Conway. Chuck Norris is one of just over 100 individuals to be awarded the title of Honorary Marine in the entire 250-year history of the Corps. Some missions may require a battalion, but this one just requires an Honorary Marine. #USMCHistory #USMC #SemperFidelis

BREAKING: Senate votes to block funding for DHS and TSA.

@DareneqSally @Vol_Hoops @ChristinaTippen Yeah and Tennessee is a team that never can adjust to that….

@Classified_Goat @Vol_Hoops @ChristinaTippen They're a 3 point shooting team.

first round / first five

Rick Barnes didn’t prepare for the three ball…..however, they never can guard it….

"Your language is inappropriate." "It's in your library!" You can't make this up.

@BigBoyVol @VandyFan__ @Djackso1492

@VandyFan__ @Djackso1492 Comes complete with a Second Helping name tag with Curtis Loew lyrics courtesy of @Classified_Goat

Me, watching the rest of America finally grasping Freebird the same way I have since 1973

This was the meteor that hit Ohio today. Unfortunately, Ohio is still there.

A passenger on Spirit Airlines catches the company duct taping their plane together “Just give me my money back” I believe this is actually ‘speed tape,’ a temporary fix for aircrafts for non critical fixes

🚨 BREAKING: Air traffic at ALL THREE major Washington, DC area airports has been HALTED after a strong chemical smell was detected at the Air Traffic Control center at the Potomac TRACON No word on what the substance in the air is. America’s on edge, and DHS is STILL CLOSED. Infuriating.

@VolMoose2 And 8 mil for this:

4 million for this.

Fire Rick Barnes

@Vol_Hoops Give Rick a raise….

tough day