The Craptain (PoopMates)

You’re in her DMs. I’m following her poop schedule. We are not the same.

@litteralyme0 A man of culture

@McNasty Proof???

im crappin shits you've never even heard of. your ass cant even contemplate the level at which my butt poops. out here droppin sludge like a shrek sneeze. layin logs a lumberjack dreams of. passin choco chunks that'll make count chocula cream his jorts. step back rookie

I will not rest until there is a bidet in every home in America.

@Shirinsmit Wiping your ass with toilet paper

What is extremely unhygienic but everyone seems to do it anyway???

To those of you who still wipe your ass with toilet paper, why are you retarded?

@SlumRNA_Dog Real

Make him take his morning dump and make it a really good one so that he thinks he’s in for a great day. Now make him have to take another. Now make him have to take another. Now have him take one more. Now make his wife say “oh my god are you shitting AGAIN?” through the door.

When you drop generational brown and get a phantom wipe

Imagine being a night pooper

@catalinmpit Hear me out. What about a social media platform for people who shit.

@camrrowe Sporting clays is on the agenda for this weekend now

Every time I see a video about the drone war that makes me go "holy shit this is insane" another one gets sent to me that tops it. 4k quality with dolby level sound on this one, you should turn up sound when watching this. The drone barely misses the pickup truck, and is still flying even after 3 apparent direct hits from a shotgun at close range.

@_VaibhavGupta @catalinmpit I was thinking more like twitter...for your asshole crapgpt.ai

@PoopMatesApp @catalinmpit LinkedIn clone?

New social media platform for people who ship.

Hear me out

Shoutout to @iamjasonlevin and @memelordtech for making the best memelord tools in the game. Memes make millions baby. memelord.com

If you don’t cut sandwiches diagonally I can’t fw you

@NoahRyanCo Noah are you a morning pooper or a night pooper?

Play games you’re uniquely suited to win. Work hard at things that come naturally to you. Just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should

@iamjasonlevin Shhhhiiiiiiieeeeeeettttttt!!!!

ANNOUNCEMENT: I raised $3 million to make memes. Yes, seriously. Memes make millions. Welcome to the new memelord.com

@BioavailableNd You're in her DMs, I'm following her poop schedule. We are not the same.

You are in his DM's, I'm making him spit in a petri dish to see if he's colonized by mold. We are not the same.