OffensiveHaiku.com

Haiku #15 – The Zen of Your Mother She masturbates me Into her awaiting mouth Your mother swallows.

@DelusionPosting Jesus Christ this is some funny shit right here and I have no idea why.

@Headshok1962 Is this a spoiler for next week's episode of The Pitt?

Oof

@nheller718 Where the Hell else are you getting exposed to Wagner like that?

Same

@defenestrat1ons Some dudes just need to know they have the biggest, baddest dog in the neighborhood. Some dudes also are compensating for something.

nothing more unattractive than a man who owns a pitbull

@ma1ybe His wife’s ghost was clearly haunting the heck out of him.

To be Loved even in death

@Valiciousvalici Insert "makin' bacon" joke here.

"Best part is at the end. "my only real limits are my imagination & the clock 😂 real job steals the whole day so i turn into a night owl, sacrificing sleep like it’s no big deal. but fam, i love every second of it 😌 who needs 8 hours when you’re having this much fun creating?

@phonybone I am so glad I'm not the only one here who finds this incredibly disrespectful. I have almost divorced my wife of 23 years over this.

It’s anti art when your girlfriend goes to the bathroom during a movie you like and says you don’t have to pause it

@Ibemumu1 So you literally want the shit fucked out of you. I respect that.

Letting him fuck me until I poo on his dick🤤🤭>>>>>

Haiku #54 – The Zen of Life in the Logging Camp Billy went to work With his chainsaw and his boots Logging camp gang bang

@buddydawg77 I find your lack of faith disturbing.

I am your father!! 🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@sapphirecyan333 Yes - I can relate Haiku #103 – Dungeon Zen II She strapped me in tight So that I could not escape Seven hour spanking

I can’t get spanked on my birthday because no one has the patience to spank me over 9000 times

@jacksondgreen This is known as Dick Iaido and has been practiced by some of the finest cocksmen of Japan for centuries. You also need to scream "Hai!" when you're cumming.

Pulling out my cock and cumming in one fluid motion like a samurai unsheathing his sword.

@MenezesCracked She was his Soul Mate and now she's my Soul Mate too.

@ElroyFudge Those little pricks need to learn how to perform under pressure. You are doing God's work.

I like to go to my 5-year-old nephew's T-ball games and yell, "You suck, faggot" whenever one of the kids strikes out. The ball is sitting on a fucking tee, for gods sake, how hard is it to hit the fucking thing?

@RealPostFolder Jesus Christ, why the Hell do I keep reading these things?

Haiku # 49 – The Zen of Children's Charity Fundraising II Little cancer boy asking for a donation shut up and fuck off

@Czar_Of_Silly This is a fucking trap - you go there, you're going to end up in the cage behind her. I just barely managed to escape by chewing my own foot off.

Alright boiz I need one more, who’s cumming with me man?

@klara_sjo The sad thing is, you're right, I needed to be told. Thank you.

Don't stick your dick in it.

@ikisnick No, you're not the asshole. Your son is just being super gay about it.

@thechosenberg Maybe you could fix him if you tried anal.

Look no further