Aim True (Amy Pagett)

For those who are new to following me. Here is my bio. aimtruecoaching.com/post/amy-s-bio

@kuca_postignuca Thank you for sharing.

🎯🏆💜🍀🥇

@ConsciousKeith Drama creates chaos which is often familiar to certain peoples nervous systems. They are recreating what feels “safe” for them. I also think there’s an element of distraction. As long as the focus is on other people there’s no time for self reflection.

Why do you think people often like drama? What is the psychology behind this..?

@Persistence982 I am so glad you’re in admin Heidi. We need more leaders who are self aware.

@AimTrue7 Trauma recovery work has taught me to check in with my own system as I respond to interactions & situations as a school administrator. Dysregulation could come at any moment, but I leverage self-awareness of shame or inadequacy. But I get hammered by it in personal relationships

When leaders lead with shame and judgment it’s often because they haven’t explored their own shame and judgment yet. It lies beneath the surface leading the way.

Each of us are experts in our own lives. It is never ok to tell someone what to do or how to do it. Instead hold a safe space for people to figure out what is best for them.

Pressure is something an abused woman knows well. In service of protection she often shuts down when pressure is applied. So adding pressure & telling her to leave will be seen as a threat and your attempt to help will likely push her away. Respect her timeline and her choices, something her abuser does not do.

@bluewmist Yes! When someone shares their story listen with compassion and curiosity. Let it be about them not you!

normalize not bringing up a similar story about yourself when someone is telling you something about themselves, just listen

@MindTendencies2 It’s so important to discern between control and connection.

@shadows_control Your body will tell you everything you need to know.

Pay attention to the physical signs—tight chest, racing heart, knots in your stomach. Your body knows. #DomesticAbuseAwareness

Good leaders don’t tell you what to do. They hold space while giving you the opportunity to find your way.

@shadows_control Most victims of abuse have learned to act “fine” because they’ve been taught that their feelings aren’t valid or worthy. Acting fine is often what provides safety. Showing your feelings is often met with more abuse and manipulation.

Abuse hides behind closed doors and perfect smiles. Don’t assume someone’s okay because they seem fine. #DomesticAbuseAwareness

@shadows_control I think abused people don’t tell because they carry such heavy shame. It’s not theirs to carry, it belongs to the abuser but their reality has been skewed and they think “it’s me, I am the problem”

Question: “Why didn’t you tell your friends or family?” Answer: Abusers isolate you, making you feel like no one will believe you. They plant doubt & shame, breaking your trust in others. Reaching out feels impossible, even to those closest to you.

@DrCarlHindy When fear is met with curiosity it allows one to see all possibilities and not just the worst case scenario.

My personal truths as a clinical psychologist, for today (July 13, 2026): Fear distorts reality. Fear is one of the most powerful forces in the human mind. It doesn’t just change how you feel. It changes what you think is true. A spouse comes home quiet and you’re sure something is wrong. Your teenager doesn’t answer a text, and you imagine a tragedy. A headache becomes a brain tumor after twenty minutes online. Your boss says, “Can we talk?” and you’re convinced you’re about to lose your job. Fear also whispers that you’ll never find love again. That one mistake ruined your future. That people are judging you when they’re barely thinking about you. That trying something new will end in humiliation. The more afraid we become, the more certain we become. We stop asking, “What else could explain this?” and start treating our worst-case scenario as reality. Fear isn’t a liar because it invents everything. It’s a liar because it takes one possibility and makes it feel like the only possibility. The antidote isn’t pretending fear doesn’t exist. It’s slowing down, checking the evidence, and staying curious long enough for reality to catch up.

@DrDoyleSays There’s power in the pause.

One of the hardest habits to get into as we work our trauma recovery is giving ourselves time-- from taking a minute before responding, to giving our overall recovery arc the time it requires to realistically develop. Remember that urgency is a tool of Trauma Brain. And abusers.

@pigeonxphoenix I think this is a big part of recovery. For many of us we abandoned ourselves and became who we thought other people wanted us to be. In the process we often quit having opinions. As we heal we develop our agency and autonomy and become confident in what we like and don’t like.

Recently, I have started to realise that the only person whose opinion I should really care about when it comes to my life is me. Having spent most of my life so scared of others' opinions, finding this out about myself is quite exhilarating.

@KavitaGooch Thank you for sharing Kavi.

@AimTrue7 that’s what my therapist says. I’m hypervigilant, lots of it is for good reason, I get crisis/chaos whilst trying to just be, just survive, so I’m very far off from feeling safe. Lifelong struggle. Thank you 🙏 ❤️‍🩹🫂

Positive change happens when we feel safe until then survival takes a front seat.

@Persistence982 I sure did!

@AimTrue7 Wow! That's a great start to one's day. I hope you loved every second of it

I started my day on the water, a perfect way for me to feel calm and grounded.

We often rewrite reality in our minds because the true narrative is often too much to handle. So we say it wasn’t that bad, other people had it worse, or maybe we remembered it wrong.