Al Del Bene

Haiku Don't take Tylenol, It can only good happen, It's too much liquid.

@theTiser Yes, Optus

Is the Optus outage affecting you?

This is tonight! Channel 10 Australia #jflsydney #NSFW

Dearest Australia, I did a lil set for JFL. Airing June 26 on Channel 10 (remember television?) As you can see it gets emotional.

You know that muck that grows on the dish drying rack.. I sell that on ebay as kimchi starter 😁

@DaneCook Dude I learned of this from your tweets.. very interesting!

any update on what we shot down? Why the heck would it take THIS LONG to know what this object is? Anyone else feel like this is all rather odd?

@StephBroadbrid1 Who books that?!?

@DaneCook 🙋🏻

Who needs love? I have extra.

@elonmusk new owner.. who dis?

My 8 y.o. daughter's friend: God doesn't like you if you lie. My 8 y.o. daughter: Then God doesn't like anyone.

From ScoMo to AnAl.. well done Australia!

I'm an anti-slapper and I don't care who knows it..

One wonders if a comedian had slapped an actor, would they have ignored it?

Will Smith attacked Chris Rock and then helped us all heal by explaining how tough God’s plan for him is.

It's a good one, two road dogs reflecting on our lack of work through the pandemic, and both of us having extremely niche skills that don't translate to too many other career paths. You can listen wherever you get your podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/.../the-daniel… open.spotify.com/show/24rTY5TB0…

@DaneCook The comedian or the geological event?

Earthquake just made my dogs go bonkers.

Hey Putin, quit being such a jerk! (it's ok for me to say this.. some of my best friends invade countries.)

@sean_woodland My shout, cunt.

Only a racist would order Uber Eats in this weather.

@johncruckshank ... Whaddya reckon??

@richisfunny Group sex chat?

Name something worse than a group chat? #groupchat