Simone Bailey

@PapiTrumpo Putrid.

BIRTHDAY BOY IS READY TO ROCK THIS WEEKEND!!!😎🇺🇸🥳🥳🥳

@EricTrump Your old man’s a fuckhead.

🤣🤣 One of the great responses to a reporter in history! JAPANESE REPORTER: Why didn't you tell Japan before the Iran war? PRESIDENT TRUMP: "Why didn't you tell ME about PEARL HARBOR?!" "You believe in surprise much more-so than US!"

@mickitiki Yeah, well; everything he’s done is SHIT.

Exactly 💥🔥🇺🇸👊

@PaulineHansonOz The reason we have no fuel is because the Strait of Hormuz is closed. The reason it’s closed is because of the war started by your pin-up boy Trump. Get in the sea.

Fruit and vegetables rotting in the fields while farmers wait for fuel. That’s the reality under Labor right now. When farmers can’t get fuel, they can’t harvest, transport, or keep food moving to Australian families. And this hits the price you pay at the checkout. One Nation has practical policies to end net-zero and keep fuel flowing to regional Australia, support our farmers, and stop good produce going to waste. Wasted fruit and veggies destroys livings and makes food more expensive. Australians deserve better than this.

@Tara_Moss He’s clearly fkg demented!

How many countries - Greenland, Canada, Mexico, Cuba, Panama, Venezuela - will the US under Trump try to take over before someone stops them?

@KellyScaletta 21. I bought a live album by Tge Who and learned it then.

How old were you when you learned that there was no song called "Teenage Wasteland?"

@MikeyRobins Hmmmm. No. I respectfully disagree.

Best Australian cover version; ever! music.apple.com/au/album/bad-m…

@johnnymaga Looks more like he’s worrying that direct sunlight will hit him and he will turn to dust.

Barron Trump, so proud of his dad, seen studying the audience reaction at the State of the Union. He’s preparing.

@AnitaMaxxSpliff @thedimitri I would prefer “fucked” because it indicates autonomy. Sure, your partner has been with others. I assume you have, too. However, she chooses to be with YOU because she wants to be with YOU. YOU are what matters to her. That makes you special.

@Bingells @thedimitri Yes, don’t get caught up on the term, if I use “fucked” would that sit better with you? I don’t choose to focus on it, it’s like anxiety, it comes from inside. The thought of your partner with other people isn’t nice (unless you’re a cuck) regardless of gender.

One time a girlfriend of mine told me her body count was 4. I didn't think too much of it, as that's pretty chaste by today's standards. A few weeks later as we're getting closer she opened up to me about a time she was raped. Obviously, I showed her a lot of empathy and felt terrible and consoled her. However, being the jester that I am and humor being my preferred form of cheering people up, I made a very grave mistake by jokingly asking "so... uhh... is it 4 or 5 then..." She did not find it nearly as funny as I thought she would. We did not last much longer after that.

@AnitaMaxxSpliff @thedimitri “Given herself to?” She still owns her soul and identity, doesn’t she? All she did was CHOOSE to shag another consenting adult (presumably). Ppl really must stop focusing on this stuff.

@Bingells @thedimitri I hope you know many of us don’t chose to care about it. My current gf’s is a teeny bit high and it makes my whole chest and heart feel weird thinking about all this different people she’s given herself to. She’d be fair to think the same about me. I don’t judge her though.

@Matt_Pinner If this is the tone of the show, why not? She looks great!

Is this appropriate attire for 56 year old Jennifer Lopez to be performing on stage in her underwear 🤔

@TheMaineWonk “Movie star?” FFS! 🤦‍♀️

“It's lucky my movie star first lady was in front of me, 'cause I put my hand on a certain part of her body…” He’s literally incapable of going 1 hour without sounding like total creep and pervert.

@GoRKlette @meishato

@meishato “She’s getting mosquito bites” Family somehow thought pointing out my newly forming breasts and laughing like my body was a joke was appropriate.

And if you really want your mind blown? Ask any woman how old they were the very first time they felt objectified/sexualized by a man, or had something inappropriate said to them, or had something “not quite right” happen to them. Most of us were children the first time.

@hodlrr17 I wish the fkg idiot would go away.

Someday the entire world will realize all the personal sacrifices this man made to save not just America, but the world.

@RealJamesWoods “Less than two years ago…”. Mate, I’ll break this as gently as I can: you CURRENTLY have a basket case at the helm who is a blithering idiot. He is also a SA apologist who brags about groping women. WTF ails you?

America is reborn. Less than two years ago we had a basket case at the helm and a blithering idiot a heartbeat away from the nuclear button. Now we have a man of peace reshaping an “America First” world with quiet power.

@ImtiazMadmood I pretend to go along with their directions, and then shriek the most disgusting porn I have ever seen has just appeared in my screen! Then I say, “Hang on, that’s your mother,” One of them retorted, “I think it’s your daughter, Madam.” I did think it was a good comeback.

I got a call from a scammer yesterday. Me: “Hello.” Scammer: (thick, heavy accent) “Hello. This is Tom Smith from Microsoft Support. We are seeing a lot of virus activity coming from your device.” Me: “Oh no. My device? Are you sure?” Scammer: “Oh yes, Madam. We have many reports.” Me: “Oh, jeez. How can I fix it?” Scammer: “It’s okay, Madam. We can help you right now. Are you in front of your device?” Me: “Yes. I was just about to use it. I’m glad you called.” Scammer: “Good, Madam. Please push the Start button.” Me: “I think it’s already on.” Scammer: “Okay, Madam. Now click on Control Panel.” Me: “I don’t see that.” Scammer: “Do you see a bunch of information above the Start button?” Me: “Yes.” Scammer: “That is your Control Panel.” Me: “Wow. I didn’t realize it had a name.” Scammer: “Yes, Madam. Now press Internet Options.” Me: “I don’t see any Internet options. I don’t think I bought that feature. This is just a cheap one.” Scammer: “All devices have Internet, Madam. Press the Start button again.” Me: “Okay. Same as before.” Scammer: “That’s fine, Madam. We will restart your device. Please turn it off.” Me: “Um… I don’t know how. I’ve never turned it off. It kind of just stays on.” Scammer: “There must be an off button. How do you stop it when it’s running?” Me: “I usually press the big button.” Scammer: “Okay, Madam. Press that button.” Me: “Okay.” Scammer: “Is your device off?” Me: “No. The door popped open.” Scammer: “Door? Is there a disc inside?” Me: “No. There’s a burrito.” Scammer: “Why is there a burrito in your computer?” Me: “Computer? I thought you said this was microwave support.”

@TheExtremeMusi1 Can I Sit Next To You, Girl!

What is the most overlooked AC/DC song of all time???

@Hot_Pepper76 I like her voice but I think the lack of live instruments is cold.

Everything you hear in "Don’t Go", '82, bass, melody, even drums, comes from synths and drum machines. No live band instruments. Genius or too cold? What do you think? Name the band.

@lisa_8832 @Milajoy Horrible! I wouldn’t let my dog sleep on that ugly rag.

@Milajoy Let’s all just face it that pink dress was GAWD AWFUL!!! I mean it really was the worst 🤦🏼‍♀️

Are you old enough to get the joke??