Chris Lewis

@StansaidAirport *Legally

The 26th of December! I love Boxing Day, the one day of the year we’re legally allowed to punch economy passengers in the face.

This is Comet. She had an unsatisfactory walk experience today. Decided to file a complaint with management. 13/10

@HanTheHippy @fesshole No shit?

@fesshole They have a strong laxative effect btw

I've developed an addiction to Trebor Extra Strong mints. I bought a pack "for the car" a few months ago. It's now escalated to me crunching through whole packets in minutes several times a day whilst driving, gagging for the ecstasy of a mint induced sneeze.

@fesshole Give them to someone else's wife. Much more fun

Accidentally walked into Victoria's Secret whilst arguing with a colleague on the phone, didn't want to look like I was being a weirdo perving on the lingerie, so bought "the wife" an Xmas present as cover. I'm single and now have £82 worth of useless underwear

@TimNumb3rs @fesshole Worked for me 👍

I have a crush on a colleague. I think she likes me too. Nothing will ever happen - I'm married and love my wife, and she has a partner - but it is nice to feel the butterflies in my stomach for the first time in about 20 years when I see her.

@danswellandthe The burnout games had the best soundtrack!

@HillF1 Well Happy birthday Damon. You crossing the line in Suzuka along with Murrays commentary will live re n free in my memory forever.

I'm afraid all my fans are younger than me these days! But thanks Victoria. And thanks to all the Happy Birthday messagers. Aren't I supposed to be losing my hair by now, according to Paul McCartney? #64 #Beatles #f1

Dusty Viper!

Available in all good toy shops.

Special tribute as Spitfire gets new paint scheme in honour of pilot who died in crash forces.net/services/raf/s…

@SkyNews And?

Former F1 driver Ralf Schumacher reveals he is in relationship with a man trib.al/r64OXxA

@rawlimark Couldn't agree more

@pettore Gorgeous!

Just found this in a pile of photos. A Model my very best 'partner-in crime B of B friend' actually made for me.. of a Spitfire my dad flew. : ))))) ( he earns a 5 star smilie for that )

When #TheYoungOnes made the front cover of Radio Times

Top of Snowdon on Saturday afternoon after completing the Welsh Three Peaks Challenge. Total time (Penyfan - Cadair Idris - Snowdon) 14 hrs. Cracking day and evening with the boys. Raised nearly 10k so far for Hospice of the Valleys #charity #fundraiser #hiking #

Last weekend up Yr Wyddfa. This weekend @SlamDunkMusic 😃

Well done that officer. Who isn’t fed up with these provocative, loudmouth, anti-social little monsters running wild on the streets?